Hello friends of this community, lately there are many cases and many problems with emotional dependence, lack of autonomy, people who become so dependent on others that they lose even a little of their identity, they no longer know what they like, what They don't like it, their world begins to revolve around the other person and they even compromise their own Mental health. I am going to tell you about some of the things I have researched about the biggest problems found in romantic relationships today; 80% of problems come from lack of understanding and communication. difficulties in communicating and so on and there is an exercise that has caught my attention that I want to share with you, regardless of whether you are already in a relationship or whether you are already dating or married.

Suggest that you schedule a time to do an emotional checking, this emotional checking is very important to avoid creating a great distance between both of you or an emotional disconnection over time, so both of you are going to schedule a time once a week to open each other to talk about how you are feeling, to talk about the highlights during the week, about how you have handled your emotions, situations, how you feel in relation to your partner. If there is an issue that needs to be resolved, that will be the perfect time to talk and listen without judgment to what the other has to talk about, without criticizing, without defending, really so that the two of you can connect and resolve some things without fighting. Now for this to work you need to know how to communicate how to communicate what you feel and here is an essential recommendation of mine, develop your emotional self-awareness, calm down, pay attention to how you feel, name your emotions, remember that the other cannot guess how you feel, The other person is not the cause of your feelings, because sometimes we say “Oh, it just gets on my nerves” or “it's so stressful” or “it drives me crazy”, but calm down the person can have a certain influence. , but you and only you are responsible for managing your emotions, period. So do this management and know yourself to the point of saying to the other, “look, I'm very tired, that's why maybe I've been or acted like this, I want to ask for your understanding, I'm going through a difficult time, but I'm trying hard, I'm giving. The best thing, I don't want to treat you this way, excuse me if I have hurt you, if I have done anything to you”, this is being a mature person who, despite making mistakes, knows how to communicate. Before treating a person badly, you can communicate that you feel overwhelmed that you need some time alone to then be okay with your partner, so these are some recommendations about communication.

Another of the most common problems in relationships is selfishness and immaturity, “wanting to receive a lot” and “wanting to offer little”, in fact, what we currently see are people who want to enter a relationship for what they can receive from and they are not so worried about what they can give, then if the other “does me good”, “if he makes me happy”, “he drives me”, “he makes me laugh”, “yes, he is a person I like” , “as long as it's nice I want to be in this relationship,” but many times the person does not realize that they are not contributing everything necessary to that relationship and that a relationship will not always be pleasant. It is very important to find someone who supports you, of course, but every relationship will also have its difficulties, it is not easy to live with someone different from you; There is research that I was reading that says that for a relationship to be successful there must be at least four positive interactions for every one negative, that is, there will always be a negative interaction, sometimes a criticism, a slightly harsher response, but the proportion should be much more positive than negative. We need to know how to tolerate things that will not be so good in a relationship, thinking about the long term and the positive, entering a relationship in a selfish, egocentric way, well, logically, it is not going to work; Maturity in a relationship consists of giving to serve the other in wanting to make the other person happy and if the other also has that point of view and both people enter a relationship thinking "I want to make you happy", "I want this relationship to work ”, well the relationship will work.

Both of us have to give up a lot of things for the relationship to work, if I only care about my interests and he only cares about his, we will enter into a competition and we will not be the team we need to be for it to work, but if I make an effort to make you happy and you try to make me happy, we will both make each other happy and it will be very pleasant and there will come a point where this becomes natural, of course sometimes we can deviate a little from the path but we need to remember that when we are both in this mission of life together it is done much lighter, because you want to give in for the other, you want to make the other person happy and the other also wants to do the same for you and with you, it's like going on a date where both want to pay the bill and in a relationship if both want to make each other When happy, everything becomes much lighter, so if you are in a relationship, think about this and talk about this with your partner. By talking, everyone understands each other, but you have to know how to speak and you have to know how to communicate.