Ah, life. So many things happen that cause you to reflect later. Damn, I shouldn't have 'accidentally' fallen pregnant to that guy I knew for 2 months because my biological clock was ticking. I'm lucky that it worked out - and I did have good parents and a good example set for me, and no real childhood trauma - but still, I made mistakes along the way and I'm sure he'll tell you how mentally disturbed he is for having me as a mother (joke) - we all grow up with our hang ups from our parents.

I've said sooo many times 'some people shouldn't have kids' - because yes, they do it for the wrong reasons. In an ideal world, they'd be more self reflective and considerate of the child they are raising. But humans do as humans do, so perhaps something like compulsory parenting classes for all parents would be a better idea... And certainly, if you're messed up enough to do something like have a child to fix something, I'm not sure you have the wherewithal to reflect on whether it's a good idea or not.

It's such a controversial subject - I guess we have to be compassionate and understanding for those who aren't the best parents, because I'm sure that's not what they intended. If you look at intergenerational trauma from abuse - and that's from society, government, and people in general - think the Holocaust, First People dispossession and so on - you can't tell them not to have kids, as that's a kind of genocide in itself. What society needs to do is support people to heal and be better, not remove their rights, for all our desire to protect children. We're not very good at being supportive of people we've fucked up in the first place.