If I never argue with my friends about the education of our children (education that differs so much from one family to another) it's because we have one thing in common:
We are certain that no education is perfect, let alone official.
From then on, the headlines "Positive Education" irritated my pupils. But much less than benevolent education.
To think that I imposed on myself, an extra burden in the heavy task of raising four children! Benevolent education... the opposite of abusive? So I finally don't feel concerned. And neither do you, right?
Positive education speaks to me a little more, but only if it is applied, in the first place, by adults (between themselves). Which is, most of the time, not the case, and therefore quite funny. I have a hard time figuring out how to teach my children respect, love, kindness and complicity if I myself practice bashing on the Internet, or if I enjoy the idea of breaking up people out of pure generosity.
Now at home, it's free education. The one who doesn't care if you run into me on the street and don't understand our second degree.
Here it's pretty cool, and yet I'm intransigent to the values that are clean for me (no guns at home, no rudeness, etc.). But I refuse to take the head for nothing, to dramatize everything and make little humans followers of melodramatics. Most of the time, things are catching up, unlike the trust and team spirit that must prevail in a family. It is more important for me to have a brotherhood of solidarity, complicity and serenity, and for that I apply self-mockery. A perfect regulator to zap the negative, avoid cracking, avoid navel-gazing and teach them that everything is a matter of perception.
There are more serious things, things that go beyond limits and break trust. Instead of wondering if I'm going to scream once too much, if I still look like a perfect mom (#IMPOSSIBLE) I prefer to leave the room now, in silence. The loss of energy is too intense if I insist on fighting.
And most of the time... that's enough.
A second-degree mother who suddenly loses her smile... believe me: it throws a cold.
Sometimes this is not enough. Of course sometimes I yell once and for all because that’s the same thing: teaching them that adults have limitations also, that Mom can be so disappointed, that she can cry. I order them to go into the garden when the anger is too strong, violence is banned.
Educating four children is not so hard. It’s fun, if you decide.
The hardest thing is staying a nice, sensitive adult. Otherwise, positive or benevolent education is only a big joke.
So I decided not to grow up too fast...
And then instead of digesting a billion books on "fashionable" education, make a shortcut with "Toltec chords" for your greater good, and theirs! Because instead of bending over methods, adult can be re-educated sometimes.
I take this opportunity to say that I have nothing against addicts to this kind of methods, just against the fashion effect not really used wisely. Every family has to find the right balance! I do, however, have a strong dislike for adults who engage in harassment, either out of school or at work. I can only worry about my children crossing theirs.
But this is only my opinion, and my blog.
Kisses
