A woman of sorrow too sensitive for easy survival can't immunize against others pain I feel their wounds. I am opened to love w/c makes me opened to pain.
I turned my anger inward, did nothing to change what hurt me & got too depressed to change anything at all. I was angry at a lot of things, all of them lumped into a self pitying sense that I was a victim bowed down by large lumps of life's unfairness. Anger took control of my life & shoved me brooding into a black hole of the soul where I surrendered to my sadness. I did not have the energy to lift my soul.
Then I realized that my heart was bitter,
and I was all torn up inside. I was so foolish and ignorant— I must have seemed like a senseless animal to you. Yet I still belong to you;
you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, leading me to a glorious destiny.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
I desire you more than anything on earth. My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; he is mine forever.
Psalm 73:21-26
