I-dentity - Who Am I?

What is my I-dentity, and how do I get it?

For many of us in today’s consumerist materialistic capitalistic society, our Identity is more often than not defined by our Eye-dentity and a long way from our I-dentity. Later we will describe 5 Steps Towards I-dentity, but first it’s worth being clear on the differences between the terminology.

We are primarily a visually oriented species and, excepting the individualities of perception which is beyond the scope of this article, we all think we see the same things in the world around us. We make judgements of others’ differences based on how we see them, and we let mass-media tell us who we are by persuading us what clothes to buy, what make-up to wear, what adornments to attach to our body, what restaurants to visit, what drinks to consume, what foods to buy, what celebrities to love, and what countries, creeds, nationalities or beliefs to hate. By listening to these influences we are attuning to our Eye-dentity, staining our Identity, and losing sight of our true I-dentity.

Even our definitions of the common word Identity are confusing and out of sync with social dictates…

identity – noun – who a person is, or the qualities of a person or group that make them different from others ~ cambridge dictionary

Personality traits, abilities, likes and dislikes, your belief system or moral code, and the things that motivate you — these all contribute to self-image or your unique identity as a person. People who can easily describe these aspects of their identity typically have a fairly strong sense of who they are. ~ healthline.com/health/sense-of-self

These quotes, and many other definitions, indicate that Identity is the uniqueness of who we are, but when we look at ourselves in society we find the contradiction and notice that we spend most of our time trying to fit in and be the same as our peers, an association which we then call our Identity. No wonder we’re confused!

Identity is the root of dualism. The ability to Identify something requires that it be different, and difference can only exist in dualism. To know that a man is not a woman, and a dog is not a cat, requires this duality, which in most cases for us laymen equates to Eye-dentity, or the differences we can see. An interesting example is that most people would argue that a tree is not a bush (based on Eye-dentity) but science tells us there is no intrinsic way to distinguish a tree from a bush. So, apart from their Eye-dentity, trees do not exist. (Are trees real? and No such thing as trees )

It is relatively easy for us to gain an Identity (indeed, we are forced into having one at birth through the creation of our birth certificate), yet we can see from above that our Identity provides very little evidence of what our true I-dentity is.

Creating our I-dentity requires a deeper, more inquisitive effort. Our I-dentity lies in the mannequin of our being beneath the adornments (Eye-dentity) we have layered upon it, even beneath the subtle beliefs, values and character traits (our Identity) we have saturated ourselves with. Discovering our I-dentity allows us to step into an Awakened state or even Enlightenment ( Awakening v Enlightenment ).

Ultimately, I-dentity resides in non-dualism, but let’s not go quite that far for now. We can create a working I-dentity that helps us live a more authentic life within this physical reality without delving into deeper philosophies.

5 Steps Towards I-dentity

1. As mentioned previously, use the analogy of a mannequin to help visualise the pure being that exists beneath the adornments of emotions and artefacts. Some religions and faiths use the analogy of a dirty mirror, clouded over the ages with dust and dirt that obscures our pure reflection.

2. Don’t fear purity. Stand naked in front of the mirror. What do you Eye-dentify with yourself when you strip away the dirty Identity of social and cultural influence? The naked mannequin beneath the fake adornments of peer pressure is the true foundation of our physical self. How can we adorn it effectively if we don’t recognise and understand it?

3. Improve our EQ, our Emotional Intelligence – a term popularised by psychologist Daniel Goleman since the 1990’s with his book Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ ( EQ )

4. Practice Mindfulness and Meditation. These are the core paths to self-awareness and I highly recommend Stephen Procter’s MIDL Meditation series as an enjoyable and effective practice ( MIDL Meditation )

5. Build intentional daily routines. With my coaching clients we use a daily habit tracker to instil effective routines to simplify and de-clutter our life. To begin though, simply start to recognise the daily or weekly routines that you have created to make life more manageable. With mindful recognition of our existing routines, we can begin to remove the harmful (Identity or Eye-dentity) ones and instigate more beneficial ones. By de-cluttering our life in this way we create spaces for our true I-dentity to begin to expose itself.