In the process of growing we meet people and our relationship with them changes within time. As a kid, I always believed if someone wants be with me and wants to play with me is because they truly want to be my friend. So, if anyone was friendly with me, I would melt for them because it made me think that they genuinely cared about me. Now, in my 50s I realize that most of the kids wanted to play with me because they wanted to play with my toys, wanted to stay with me because they wanted to eat the tasty snacks my mother used to make. I shouldn't count what happened as a kid because we don't realize when we are using someone for our benefits. But even after growing up, it took me a long enough to realize but in the end I have learned that sometimes people care about what you can do for them more than they care about you.

A real event that had happened with me and it was a few years ago. Honestly, I don't consider it as a bad habit but I always preferred to help people even though it was hard for me. I did not bother about what they think about me or what they feel for me. If someone needed advice, financial help or going through depression then I would try to give my best to develop the situation for them. Even if I had busy schedules, I would make time for them.

So, one day I saw my phone ringing a call from unknown number. At first, I didn't pick up because I don't receive calls from unknown numbers. Then I saw a text message, "Hey, it's me your school friend, Prapto. Pick up the call." So it was the old friend of mine who had called me. I was very happy to hear his voice after a long time, we didn't have contact for years. We talked for almost 25 minutes and I felt happy that he still remembered me. Then suddenly he changed the topic and the shared real reason for the call.

He was in debt and he needed my favor, without any questions I helped him because that time I had the capability to do that. We had met at a restaurant and I gave him the money. He looked thankful and we continued our conversations for a few days. But then slowly it felt like he was disappearing. He did not make any calls or message and even my last message was not seen. So, there was no response from his side, nothing at all. After a few months, I was waiting in a cafe for my wife and there I met him. I was not expecting it and we talked for a few minutes later he said, "If you ever need anything let me know" He was being polite but I knew that he won't call me again unless he needed something also he said that line only to say it. I was right he never called me again. I didn't even ask for the money I gave to him, because I was helping him out not giving him loans.

I am sharing my personal story so people can realise that genuine care does not always need a reason. When someone values you, they will sometimes look up for you and at least try to know how you are doing. Everyone is busy in their life after getting married but we should still make some time for our friends and family. The one who truly admires your presence they will remember you, even when you have nothing to offer. I am a grown up man now and I no longer want a large circle of people. I want to have a small circle where I have genuine relationships and where there is no calculation of who gave what and who received what.

This is my entry to a contest of indiaunited, if you wanna participate feel free to join, here is the link.

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