Truths and roses have thorns about them
― Henry David Thoreau
It’s no secret roses strengthen relationships. Truthfulness too. But to what extent we should be truthful to maintain a healthy relaitonship— I don’t have the idea, yet, I would say, speak not at all. Bury every secret you have, forget them as if you never had a life before… hahaha.
It’s true falsehood begets more falsehood. And in most times, you are exposed eventually as hiding something continuously takes more efforts than confessing the truth and live by. On top of that, if your partner is quite sensitive, chances are every words you say will be cross-checked later you speak in the same context— takes a toll to evade such inquisitive minds. Damn!
Still, you gotta skip something.
There is nothing like nothing-but-truth in relationship and no such person exists who likes or comfortable with everything about you. Perhaps, they manage not to bother, it’s okay they might say but that doesn’t mean you’ve been glorified, that’s a lie if someone say so. It’s far better to be okay-okay with whatever it is and let go than emphasising how cool you are not to bother about them at all— you know, acknowledging the feelings.
Everything aside, truthfulness sets the pillar of trust and authenticity; guides us through emotional stability. It’s an act of courage not everyone is capable of exploring. And the bravest of all is he who embraces it in open arms. Doing otherwise is just escaping the moment but eventually, destiny reveals the truth itself creating bitter memories. This is where it starts falling apart— trust, reliability, and transparency starts fading away. No matter how hard you try, a simple mistake, even unintentional, may overthrow your attempt to make it up.
But most of us learn to let go, ignore things that might upset the situation. This where our conscience reigns, guides us to live in sanity blinded by the futile attempt of peaceful living. Could be the other way around, maybe, I don’t know.
Last few days I am having this kind of debate with one of my friends what’s the definition of truthfulness in relationships. Is it being true to words? Being loyal? Or simply devoid of lies? Both of us couldn’t figure out, unfortunately. It depends.
But it seems truthfulness is not merely being honest but pursuing the honesty consistently— respecting the sincerity that sets the paths straight. Or may be ensuring transparency regardless of intentions. And it’s not easy to confront. There is always a threat of uncomfortness, living exposed, without armours to protect during adverse times. Quite a challenge though, but, if accomplished and there is someone to go along, it refines the relationship in a way never imagined, forges it for eternity.
Getting to such a stance perhaps requires the act of forgiveness at most. Acknowledging the typical human traits— we are prone to make mistakes. Keeping away our judgemental attributes is a must, I guess. It hurts to be judged once opening oneself up, exposing the vulnerabilities. Being able to do that does not only show us how resilient we can be when the tender-self inside us finds the true meaning of love but it becomes a sacred ground that cultivates the raw beauty of life as well.
