The problems of couples are the same as wars, since there are two parties involved, where each has different ideas of how the world should be and none have the intention of giving in to the other. It is at that moment that there is a chain of actions that affects the other, often without measuring the consequences and producing a defensive reaction that in most cases makes situations worse.
It is quite sad that we see one of the people we love most in the world and that is supposed to be our life partner, as if it were a dangerous enemy because we do not know how to deal with the differences of thinking of our partners. It is for this reason that we must learn a little of this subject to maintain more stable relationships and also much more bearable.
The first thing we must recognize is that our mind tries to model the world, tries to understand how things work to deal with them on a day to day basis. The problem is that you have a '' MODEL '' of the world in your head, while other people have another. It is natural, because each one grew up under different circumstances, they have different education and if that was not enough, it is more likely that one thinks as a man and the other as a woman, although this is not always the case.
The point is that everyone in their little mental world, believes that it is right, when in reality there is no '' CORRECT '' or '' INCORRECT '' only what exists are points of view. When we begin to understand this, we begin to understand many things by becoming more tolerant of differences.
Humans are ultra defensive at the moment of talking about what we believe that "SHOULD BE". The problem is that 99% of the problems of couples are based on events or events, when we discuss facts, we can discuss all day because each person has their own version or justification of these facts. And this is where I always ask:
When we talk about feelings of how the situation affects us from the sentimental point of view, no one can ever debate it, since only you know what happens in your head and your feelings. When we solve the problems at the level '' SENT'', we can start thinking about the other person to reach agreements, points or means, to avoid that feeling is presented again because it is affecting the person you want, managing to explain and expose our views in a better way.
Nobody is forcing you to be with that person. If you want to solve this type of problem, you better start to understand the other person's world, as well as knowing how to understand the perception of our world.
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