There was a time when I used to be too tuned into what people thought of me, to the point where I became very shy and uncomfortable in crowds. So it happened that I once spent a holiday with a family that was very difficult to access emotionally. That is where I learned to keep my head up high and smile even when I'm not happy.
No one truly knows when I'm sad unless I intentionally want to show it, all I do is write down my emotional turbulence and get relieved or I talk to someone I like and become better.
When I'm not feeling okay I usually notice it because I might feel a bit down or overwhelmed. If I don't address it, I will have trouble sleeping, especially in the afternoon. I will end up spending that time imagining and overthinking things, which isn't good for my mental health.
Another thing I tend to do is overwork myself. Two years ago, I remember how I would do all the house chores when I was hurt, sad, or angry. If my mom noticed and asked if I was okay, I would say I was fine. But if she asked again, I would burst into tears. If my mom wasn't around to ask, after finishing the chores, I would go into the bathroom, stand under the shower, and let my tears flow. It gave me some strength back then because I would immediately feel relieved after crying. But then I would tell myself I wouldn't cry anymore, even though I always ended up doing so.
But as I grew older I had other ways of dealing with my emotions. The first thing I did was to work on the sensitive side of me. I learned to understand that sometimes people don't mean what they say, and even if they do, it doesn't matter. That I am the one who writes my own life story, and I shouldn't let other people's opinions define me.
I also learned to be socially free and treat everyone as ‘friends.’ This made a big difference in my emotional and mental well-being. I became a much freer person because I cared less about what people said.
Lately, my go-to coping mechanisms for maintaining optimal well-being are listening to music, reading my Bible, and talking to someone I like. I find these three things to be incredibly therapeutic.
Music helps me forget about my problems and serves as the perfect way to unwind. However, I've realized that if I don't address the underlying cause of my emotional instability, I'll still be troubled a few hours after the music stops. It only takes a small trigger to send me back into that "not fine" state.
So what I do is find solace in the word of God, I read my Bible and renew my spirit. This brings me immediate peace and calmness and sometimes I fall asleep immediately after.
Talking to a loved one is also an amazing coping mechanism when I'm feeling emotionally unstable. It feels like having a built-in support system right there for me.
Whenever I open up and share my feelings with someone I trust, it provides a sense of relief and comfort. They offer a listening ear, understanding, and even helpful advice.
Whether it's a close friend, a family member, or a partner, having that connection and being able to express myself helps me process my emotions and see things from a different perspective.
I would like to conclude that self-discovery is the first step towards emotional intelligence. When we know who we are, we will find it easy to identify and manage our emotions.
However, I've realized that Imperfections is a beauty on its own and that it's very okay to not be okay. We learn and grow every day, and that gives us hope for a better future.
My love for sunsets ❤️. All Images Are Mine
