The noise still echoed in her head, just as the hammering of the earth's surface does in demagnetization. The alarm rang continuously as if there was an emergency that must be followed as Mary tried to put it on while snoozing, stretching her hand to pick up her phone. She grumbled and folded her blanket then unlocked her phone. She scrolled through her phone and looked at the picture she had screenshotted last night.
Dimming her eyes, the picture showcases a man standing with his colleagues, smiling like life had been kind to him. Still effortlessly handsome and composed. Everyone else in the picture looked like part of the movement but the man looked like the reason for it.
“He is a tease !!” rang in her head as she stood up by the window gently pulling open the blinds as soft light began to fill the room.
“ Why is it that the uptown ladies always have something to say when it comes to him” she continued talking about her friend group before going back to her phone which rang immediately as if it wanted her to pick it.
“ Hello babe, how was your night?
“ What sup Bisi, I am fine” she answered the familiar voice on the phone.
“ Go check your guy’s update today, I don't want you to miss today's info. That man has not got over you” her friend replied before the call dropped with good-bye.
Mary quickly went through her social media to search for Benson Amadi, the man she followed in his life online. Every post feels personal to her and she builds a story in her head to feed her fantasy world. He has posted about peace and she thought that he was missing her.
“ Knock, knock !! A sound called her back to reality and an elderly woman came in, she moved through the house with a quiet, practiced rhythm as if every step had been learned long ago and never forgotten. Her back was slightly bent not just from age but from years of work that had shaped her posture into something permanent. She dressed in simple, neat but faded clothes. There was a dignity in the way she carried herself, with no complaints, no rush, just a steady presence that filled the spaces others overlooked.
“ Hi Miss Mary” she said calmly and her voice was soft but clear carrying a quiet authority born not from position but from years of understanding more than she ever said.
“ Can I have a chat with you and hope it will not trigger you” she continued as her eyes spoke something deep and aware, she had seen too much of life to be surprised by anything yet still chose gentleness.
“ Come sit here old lady, you know you are the only one I have after the death of my parents “ Mary said, stretching her hands to help the woman sit on the bed beside her.
“ I have noticed you moved through life guided by echoes rather than instinct.
Your decisions rarely begin within but by the loudest voice that speaks around you.
You don't sit with your own thoughts and silence feels unfamiliar and almost uncomfortable for you so you fill it quickly with opinions, trends, and advice from others.
In the world full of noise, you are never truly lost but you are never truly found either” she gulped saliva and continued.
“I noticed you are living in the shadow of a past relationship you never truly understood.
Can you switch your phone off and stay to yourself today to think it through?” she concluded with a smile.
This never once came to Mary's mind and she nodded her head like an Agama lizard in agreement before the old woman left. Mary brought out her phone and stared at the picture a little longer than she should have, wondering, “Was Benson’s smile ever hers or did she just imagine it?” She reckoned before switching off her phone.
Her journey in the room that whispers nothing was at first an inconvenience as she was a restless type and followed anywhere sound was heard. After some hours in silence, something prompted her mind.
“ Why did you listen to everyone except yourself?”
She quickly opened her eyes to see if someone was talking to her.
“ Do you know what year it is?” the same inner voice asked and she replied.
“ I never thought of that” she brought out her phone then revisited Benson's post with no emotion, no panic, and just stillness then read the same post again and for the first time, she saw none of it was about her and it never was.
She sat in a rare moment of quiet reflection as she finally saw the truth and in that silence is where clarity comes.
She understands her mistakes.
She didn't lose Benson to another woman but lost him to noise, fear, doubt, and lack of self-trust.
She realized that he didn't leave because he stopped loving her but he left because she never believed she was worth loving and she sat in silence, not empty but aware.
And that silence becomes her first step towards growth even though Benson is gone for good.
