We all know that arguments are part of everyday life. It doesn't matter whether it's with someone we love, a friend, a colleague, or even a stranger; arguments/disagreements happen. Sometimes the argument might be about a small thing, like who left the light on or even who took my phone, while other times the argument can get serious and can lead to unexpected situations. But how do I deal with it?
The first thing I do is listen, because we have some people who argue just to win and not to understand the other person, because listening is very important, and if I am not careful, things can escalate quickly. So when an argument happens, I try to keep quiet and really pay attention to what’s being said. I want to understand both sides, even if I don’t agree. Sometimes, by listening, I realize I misunderstood something, or I begin to see why the other person feels the way they do.
Secondly, I try to stay calm, even though it can be hard when I’m angry. If I’m trying to settle an argument and I notice that both parties aren’t listening and are still raising their voices, I don’t join in by raising mine. Instead, I remain calm because it helps me think clearly. If I let my anger take over and raise my voice, I might end up saying something I don’t mean, and that could make the argument even worse instead of resolving it.
We have some arguments that are just about pride, because some people just want to satisfy their pride, they keep the argument going, which is not supposed to be. Sometimes winning the argument is not worth the stress. If the argument is about a small matter like what I mentioned, who left the light on? then let us let it go, because letting it go doesn't mean you are weak, but it means you're wise enough to keep your peace. But if the argument is about a big issue, especially something related to our lives, then we should definitely speak up, because it's about our lives we are talking about, but we should be careful with the words that will come out of our mouths.
I can still remember when I was in 200 level second semester, my department and another department were offering the same course, and the hall we were using there was not enough chairs making some of the students to sit on the floor. I needed to go to the toilet to ease myself, so I asked one of my friends to save my seat for me while I was gone, I also took permission from the lecturer before stepping out. When I came back after using the toilet, I saw that someone from the other department was sitting in my seat. What made me even angrier was that he had dropped my bag on the ground. I walked up to him and told him to stand up because that was my seat. But he pretended like he didn’t hear me.
Finally, when he saw I wasn’t backing down, he told me he didn’t see me there. I asked, ,“Didn’t you see my bag on the seat?” He said it didn’t matter because I wasn’t sitting there. That answer really upset me, and we started arguing by then the lecturer has also stepped out to do something. I was so angry that my eyes were red, but I knew if I kept arguing, I might say something that would make things worse. So, I decided to calm down, picked up my bag from the ground, and sat on the floor instead. Even though I was upset and also upset with my friends by letting him sit on my seat, I knew walking away was the best choice.
Also, whenever I want to settle an argument, I prefer face-to-face to chatting with people because we have some people who can misread your words and get upset thinking you're favouring the other person, so that's why I prefer face-to-face because when they hear your voice, it will make the matter peaceful. After all, no one is perfect, and we all make mistakes, and arguments happen.
In conclusion, arguments are a normal part of life, they happen to everyone. What really matters is not who was right or wrong, but how we deal with the argument. If we stay calm, listen well, and talk with respect, we can avoid saying things we’ll regret. In the end, keeping peace and understanding each other is more important than trying to win the argument.
This is my entry for the Hive Learners Featured Content Week 161 Episode 02
Thanks for reading💞💞💞💞💞.
