In a recent conversation with some folks, I reminisced about how much of an extrovert I was as a kid. Much after the conversation, I thought of how much different I am now, and I wondered where that kid went to.
As a kid, I would take walks to see what's happening around, stop at places of a few friends, and I was pretty active with social media like Facebook and 2go then. But as the years went by, I became less and less enthusiastic about anything even remotely related to fun. And that drastic change happened mostly in recent years.
My everyday life now revolves around my room, my phone and laptop, and any other responsibilities that require my attention. "That guy that's always with his phone and laptop" is something similar to how some people acquainted with me would refer to me if they didn't know my name. It was funny to hear, but deep down, I knew that really wasn't a great perception of me.
Yesterday, I went to a nearby hotel to charge up my devices. I got there around noon and stayed there for hours. At 6 p.m., a man said hello to me. And then we had a little chat. At the end of the conversation, he made a remark that made me lighten up a bit, and I thanked him for such a comment. But then something struck me when I thought about it later.
He said, "Ever since I got here, you have been on your laptop, focused and working. Very well done." I was taken aback by it, as I didn't even think someone would register that. I had been working for hours indeed, and I wasn't even close to rounding up at the time the man said so. I went on to spend another thirty minutes there.
It was nice to hear that someone saw that I was working hard, but I looked at it again and saw that it was the same perception about me being all too focused on things unrelated to connecting with people, investing in relationships, and taking time to live. Projecting it into the future and picturing how things can turn out for me, I realise that it is something to be concerned about.
In some ways, I am not paying adequate attention to my environment, the people around me, my wellbeing, and that of those I care about. All because I am getting all consumed by the pressure to succeed in my career and earn more.
I knew that I wanted something a little deeper than achievements this year, but I was a little unsure what they were at the time the new year came. Lately, thankfully, I have been doing some reflections, and this right here is part of the things I am going to work on to get better at.
This year, I am letting go of this overindulgence in the things that shouldn't matter more than the more important parts of my life. That shouldn't be my definition. It is going to be something that I'll do overnight. It is a decision I am taking now, but it really is a journey from now on.
It goes deeper than it is here, though. Seeking better ways forward, applying them, and acting on them is part of what is going to be on my drawing board for the year. This year, I am working more on unplugging...
