Haris was a classmate of mine during my school days. He was a really bright student. We became really good friends and shared the bench since the first academic year. It was because of our academic understanding that we became great friends. I got to know that he was also my neighbor in the second year.
I never saw him as my academic rival. I respected him for his hard work even as a child. This was until our parents got to meet each other during the parent teacher meeting. We both introduced eachother to our parents. This is what I regret.
After that introduction, Haris started to meddle into my personal life and important matters. At first I thought that he was just trying to be kind and nothing else. At the end of the 3rd year, my marks were not as good as his. He stood first and I stood third. Obvisouly getting third position was a good achievement and I was happy because I was not in competition with anyone.
He went and told my result to my parents and emphasized on his result more. This way he set a standard and comparison in my parents' mind. I was feeling so bad about it that I stopped talking to him. I went straight to him and said,"I was not expecting that from you at all. I never liked your meddling into my personal matters. I have always loved learning and now you have put this rat race into my parents' mind."
That made me realize that I had to set some boundaries. It was probably the first learning that I still hold very important about knowing and understanding the nature of people. I was very young back then and I am proud of how I handled that matter with maturity.
Ever since that episode, I convinced my parents that I am their child and I should be the person they should be trusting, not a classmate of mine. They have also been very understanding since then. I try to keep people away from my own matters. I do seek help whenever I need it from others and there is no shame in asking for help. However, people meddling into my affaris is still a borderline for me.
So many people have tried to do this in my academic circle and in my professional life too. Thanks to that experience, now I am very articulate about my boundaries at all levels.
Thank you for your time. I hope you liked it. Have you had any such experiences?
The pictures are my own.
