Why fathers prefer inlaws to boyfriends
Men will always be men no matter the situation. Fathers are likely the same with slight cultural differences. I think the western culture to some extent allows fathers to accept and allow their daughters to have a boyfriend and to also introduce him to the father. I might be wrong though but in the African culture, which I am a part of, fathers will always not want to allow their daughters boyfriends. The only thing they love to hear and also welcome is a husband. This is also not applicable to all families though but the greatest number of fathers do this a lot.
I think that fathers that do not welcome or accept their daughters having boyfriends are living a hypocritical lifestyle because in the world today, virtually all girls have a boyfriend. The ones with strict fathers will always want to hide them till when they are ready for marriage then they will bring the boyfriend to the father for proper introduction. This is because they know that the father will accept marriage rather than dating.
I recall when we were still young, my sister brought her boyfriend to our house, and in order to save her from the punishment that would have befall her, I had to act as if the guy was my friend who came to visit me. Even when I haven't met the guy before. This is how strict our father was. He will be warning us against having or keeping a boyfriend and girlfriend.
I think that the reasons below are why fathers prefer an in-law to a boyfriend.
They see inlaws as responsible people
To some extent, this may be true because a man who has made up his mind to marry is usually seen in our society as being responsible and ready to take good care of the wife. No father will like his daughter to be in the hand of a man that is not responsible. A boyfriend can easily use and dump his daughter but an in-law may not do it.
Jealousy
I think fathers too are jealous of their daughters being in the hands of another boy. They will be thinking of how the boy will be sleeping with a girl he hasn't received a bride prize from. This jealousy will only be able to end if the boyfriend pays for the girl's dowry.
The role of culture
I think culture plays a critical role here. As I had mentioned before, some cultures do not allow daughters to even have a boyfriend talk less of introducing him to her father. So this culture also forbids fathers from accepting their daughters’ boyfriends. Instead they accept the man that has developed interest to marry the daughter.
fear of repercussions
Fathers today were once young boys who rocked the streets with many girls and committed lots of havoc. Now they don't want their daughters to be victims of the same thing they did to other people's daughters. That's why they will do what they can to protect their daughters from the havoc done by most boyfriends. But karma they say will always take its course.
Finally, I would prefer to be introduced to my girl's father as an in-law rather than a boyfriend, the same I wouldn't want my daughter to introduce her boyfriend to me.
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