Between the Love you Had to Put Initial Effort into Getting and the One Where it Was a Smooth Mutual Flow from the Start, Which is Best?

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When one walks up to a prospective lover, or maybe don't walk up, but probably try to make something happen between themselves and a prospective lover that is probably already a friend or someone around but a non-lover.

When the initial move is made there are only two ways it can go. One: you immediately find that the feeling is mutual and you and your prospective lover can become lovers ASAP, or, two: the prospective lover is not feeling it and you have to put in efforts to win them.

Of these two scenarios which one is better?

For me, of course, I'll say it is the one where the feeling is mutual and you don't have to put in any effort to win them over. In fact, personally, I back away immediately if I find that the feeling is not mutual from the get go. I don't even give it a chance. I feel like after seeing me, hearing me speak and watching me move you should be in love or at least interested in knowing more and thus very cooperative. Or else I'm out.

But of course, everybody is not me. Some people don't mind the initial turbulence, they're ready to put in the effort. Some people even prefer lack of cooperation so they can look at it like a game where they have to win the person over.

While some times it is not about personal preference but the fact that you really want this person like you've never wanted anyone else in your life and you wouldn't let them go without a fight (efforts).

But it is quite an interesting thing to ponder about. Which of these feels more like genuine love when you guys finally become lovers? The former has nothing to prove, but the latter... Can it really be called love if one had to work and win it before it could happen?

On face value it seems like, the prospective lover did not care about you and still do not care about you but everything you guys have currently was built by efforts, would only survive if you keep putting in the efforts, and that without efforts they are still the same person who didn't care about you in the behind and was playing hard to get.

That is what it looks like on face value. But that's not the truth all the time. Sometimes they didn't care about you and their only there for the efforts, while sometimes it's just that they're the kind of people who don't fall in love until they get to experienced a person for longer and get to see different sides of the person.

Maybe at first you were just a face, a voice and a figure, and that does nothing to them. When you tried to hang with them they would have probably liked to hang but wouldn't create the time and ease because you're nothing to them. But after you kept showing up, talking to them, showing them you can be funny, thoughtful, kind, playful and that you had so and so hobbies and interests, they could now see you and who you really are was now laid bare in front of them and it turns out you're someone they can love.

It could be this. And if you got your lover after putting in efforts, things were not mutual from the start, you better hope it is this 😅. Because if it is not this then it means you bought your lover (bought with efforts which usually includes gifts and other acts of kindness), and a lover that was bought is definitely worth less than a lover that wasn't bought.

But then again, it's possible you bought your lover but now they have genuine love for you and even though they were bought, they're now here to stay and they'll never leave your side come what may. That is very possible. It is even possible their love for you is now stronger than the love of other lovers who weren't bought or gotten with initial efforts.

Also, for the lover who didn't need effort, it is possible they already knew some materialistic details about you before you stepped to them. Or they probably want you for a materialistic or lustful reason. It's not always for genuine reasons, that's the point. It could also be that they're someone who find it hard to say no or play hard.

Guys, it's just crazy! 🤣🤣🤣

I've brought up so many possibilities and scenarios here. But in closing, the truth is that none of these tells you how genuine your love is. Only tests can reveal how genuine your love is.

The End

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