TELL ME GO
The twilight sky smiles behind the clouds. Feels tired of the traces of memories today.Kebebahkan my body to bed and I immediately took my diary.Ku book slowly open page by page until the last page I looked at my photos with my friends and also my lover Farel.Ku tatapi satstersatu the photo album behind my diary. My photo with someone who reigned in my heart. Yes Farel.Sudah 6 months I had a relationship with him. My six months is a short enough time. I want to be with Farel longer, but I realize my age will not be long. I want to live the rest of my time with someone who now has little time for me. I want to be with Farel, the one I love today, tomorrow and forever.
"I love you very much, Rel. I do not want to lose you," I mumbled softly.
Take Me Go
Tok..tok..tok ..
The sound of knocking the door interrupted my reverie. I jerked instantly. I put my diary on my desk and immediately opened the door.
"What's wrong?" I asked kak kak, my first sister.
"No nothing. Let's go, Daddy same Mother've been waiting under" Fira kak kak half seduce.
"Yes kak, brother first aja.Nanti Nisa nyusul" I reply weak.
"Yes udah, brother first ya?" Said kak Fira while away.
After the death of Fira's feet, I am busy again on my own mind. My heart is raging but my soul is wandering. What's in my mind right now? What I obviously want to meet with Farel, I want to tell him everything, even though I do not know what his reaction is after I told him The thing I know right now is that I want him to know that I love him very much, even though I sometimes realize I'm not worthy of being loved by him. I'm a woman in the shackles of illness that probably will not be long before this disease will separate me from people people who love me.
Never mind Annisa, you do not think too much about your disease. You must believe that your illness will surely cure.You should not despair.Still the length of the way you have to go. There are still people who really love you, who do not want to lose you. look at them sad for losing you? Annisa, Forget your illness for a moment, let's say you will live forever, so try to keep fighting against your disease "A small voice whispered in my heart.
Finally, with a step as lightly as possible I walk to the dining table. There is already a father, mother, Kak Syafira and Kak Almira. I put on a serious look that I am actually busy with my own thoughts.
Oh yes, my name is Annisa Mar'atus Shalihah. I am the youngest of three siblings. I attended one of the best vocational schools in my city. My first sister Syafira Mukhafaqoh, who used to be called Fira, has worked in one of the companies engaged in the services of my city My second brother Almira Faizah was studying Accounting at one of the colleges in my town.
I can say that I'm a spoiled child, because everything I want to be obeyed. I know I grew up in a pretty fancy environment, so I grow up to be a bit selfish. Sometimes, I never want to give up even with my own sister. But, still despite my selfish and stubborn nature, father and mother still educate me to be a shalihah.Kalau child of religious issues, can say my faith is strong.Hehe.
I also know why my father and mother always spoil me, exaggerate me than my siblings, it's because six months based on hospital doctors diagnose where I was treated for two weeks I was sentenced by a doctor suffering from brain cancer, and it is estimated that my age will no longer be broken Perhaps because of that, so my brother never commented when my father and mother spoiled me.
"Annisa, you why dear, how do you face pale?" Ask the mother with a worried tone.
"Nisa no why-why Nda" I replied with a smile.
Suddenly my head ached, as if punctured thousands of needles. I bit my lip to endure this pain.
"Father, bunda.Kalau Annisa already gone, Annisa ask for the same father and mother, do not ever father or mother told Farel about Annisa.Nisa disease do not want to Farel regret has loved Nisa.Nisa also do not want to make Farel sad and Nisa mind Nisa is not there. "I said when we finished dinner.
"Why do you talk like that dear?" Ask the mother while stroking my head.
"Annisa knows Well, Bunda.Umur Nisa've not long because this disease.Makanya Nisa want before Nisa really close the eyes later, Nisa want to convey this is the same father and mother" I pleaded.
"Annisa, believe me Nak.Nisa surely cured kok.Ayah and Mother will always give the best for Nisa.Nisa not be allowed to talk like that" said mother with teary tear and hugged me immediately.
"Annisa not sure Nda if Nisa will be healed because Mother knows itself, Nisa illness already end stage, and that means age Nisa .. old Nisa not long." I say with tears.
"Yes mother know son, but please do not talk like that again ya.Bunda please very please." Said Mother.
I nodded slowly, though again my head felt very sick.I took my mother's hand. Suddenly the world around me was very dark and I can not remember anything else. Only shouts of my mother called my name.
"Women…"
Morning started greeting, I forced myself to wake up from the whole maski all my body feels very weak.I want to start today with something that can make me be happy.I want to hurry up to school, I want to meet someone who since last night haunted my dream .
"Daddy, Mama..Nisa go first yes" I say half shouted.
"Yeah. Be careful on the road. Do not forget later in the day the medicine is taken" message mother.
I immediately stepped into the porch, Alfi was waiting for me with the bike.
"Cie, again happy ya Nis, how tumben your face very cheerful" said Alfi.
"A bright morning should be greeted with a bright smile to welcome a beautiful future" I said poetically.
"It's hard if you speak poetry, must be answered with poetic" snorted Alfi annoyed.
I just smile back.
"Departure now yuk, later we are late again .." I invite the spirit.
Without waiting for the signal again we were immediately drove towards sekolah.Semoga today will bring a thousand hopes for the future someday, like the sun that always gives the light on earth.Doaku in the heart.
Arriving at school, I went straight to my classroom on the second floor of the school building.However, not yet in front of my class, a figure I know approached me.Yes, I know.It is Farel.A man who for the last six months really pulled me in the aura of his charm His eyes are always radiating affection looking at me soft.I realized, my acquaintance with him is still not long ago.At that time I accidentally hit her, because I was too hasty until I did not see him who was walking in the opposite direction saya.Kata apologize instantly came out of my mouth at the time, but he did not respond to my permama. He just walked away. I was annoyed at him. Until the next day, he came to my class.
"Annisa," he said at the time.
"What are you doing here?" I asked innocently.
"I'm sorry, because yesterday I went so aja when you say sorry my word" he said calmly.
"Yes, no papa kok" I replied lying. Actually I'm still mad at him. Son wrote, I've really apologize to him, eh he even nyuekin me. "Emangnya yesterday why?" I tried to close.
"Hmm .. Yesterday I again have the same problem Andini" he replied.
I'm a bit crunchy keningku.Siapa Andini? Understandably, I'm not too familiar with the names of other friends, even though one generation. Although I was fairly active in various school activities, but still my personality that I can not change.
"Andini who is it?" I asked. I tried to guess, Andini it must be his lover, if not maybe the closest person in his heart.
"Andini it's my boyfriend" he replied.
"Ooowh" I say.I looked at him a long time.
"Annisa, I may be your friend" he said. Suddenly he looked at me.Membuat my heart jumped up and down, because I've been staring at him.Reflex, I immediately turned my eyes to the board.
"I need someone who can be a place to vent. I need someone who can make me strong for ngejalani my days."
I was confused by the statement, I just was not sure I could enter in his life furthermore. Hesitantly, I also answer it with a small nod.
"Thank you Annisa." He said.
I also smile. Since then our relationship becomes closer. I often spend my time for a moment for him to tell me.Yes although he often tell me about his relationship with Andini, but I'm glad to be someone close to him.As his emotions began to peak, I always directing the conversation to a course that is certainly much different. I just want him to focus on the lesson.
"Nda" call that figure who has now been in front of me.I was startled.Seketika buyarlah daydreams about my acquaintance with him.Mataku switch to the figure who had been fulfilling my thoughts.
"Yes Rail" I replied.
"In the morning not dreamily daydreaming" he advised.
"Yes-yes," I replied spoiled.
"Nda, come yuk" he asked.
"Where?" I asked.
"Come on .."
I have not had time to say yes.
"Where are we going?" I asked
"Alright, come along"
After a long walk we finally arrived at a park.
"Farel, what the heck do you invite me here? It's already hours how try? Later we are late to the class" I said trying to remind Farel of his behavior.
"Yes bawel, I also know. But, do not you have a little time for me this time aja" kilahnya half pleading.
"Biarin bawel, the important tetep love" as with a little bit annoyed.Enak aja I spelled bawel.Mendengar Farel answer straight smile.
"Are you really in love with me?" She asked softly.
"Yeah, if no where I might accept you so my boyfriend" I replied ngasal.
I cock my eyes.
"What are we doing here?" I continued.
"I want to talk to you about something"
"Want to say what the hell.Emngnya really banget yes kok I samapa on invite come here" I said.
Farel just looked at me smiling.Farel, I want you to know that I want us to kayak gini terus.Sampai later, until my time has ended. Until God called me, I said mutter.We are still walking hand in hand to where Farel invites me.
Soon I and Farel had arrived in a shady tree. Around it there was a rose that grows with a haughty. Near the tree there is a clear pond. Splashing pool water adds to the atmosphere becomes very quiet. I do not want what Farel gave me today will be the last in my life. If I may ask the Almighty I want to live longer if it takes another thousand years to be with someone who truly loves me sincerely.
"Annisa, I deliberately invite you here because I want to talk with you something" he said Farel opened the conversation.
"What are you doing?" I asked casually.
Suddenly I felt a hesitant movement from him that wanted to get his body closer to me. Felar grabbed my hand.
"Annisa, forgive me" she said softly.
"Sorry for what rails" I asked curiously.
"I love you very much Nis. I do not want to leave you." She hesitated.
'What do you mean, what are you doing like that?' I asked again.
"I know Nis, it's gonna get you. But I have to keep telling you."
I am more frantic with what Farel said.What does it mean? Why he said like so. What he wants to ninggalin me and break this relationship? If emang yes then why?
"Annisa, forgive me before. If I want to end this relationship. Daddy told me to sever you and establish a relationship with another girl. I'm confused right now, because I'm faced with two very difficult choices."
My tears immediately broke up instantly.What's the point of all this? Saying the very painful thing in the place that I expect to be my loveliest place with the person I love.Hope to make this day the most beautiful day in my life instantly buyarlah already.Insure wants to embrace mounts This kind of incident never crossed my mind before. I want that if our relationship is to be over, I want to end up with a happy ending without having to be forced because there is room for a third person.
"I know, I've betrayed our love, I've scratched your wound, I've hurt you. But one you have to know. I chose him not on the basis of love, I forced Nis because my father told me to establish a relationship with him because he was infected Leukemia's disease makes her life shortly. And her last request before she leaves is that she wants me to be her lover with her age. I beg of you, Nis, please understand me. "
My tears can not be backed up and finally form a branch in my eyes. I really do not know what to do. My beloved lovers choose another woman whose destiny is the same as me. For now I am really confused.
The bell rings in. I do not care. I want it all done and nothing is hidden from us at all.
Farel, if you chose Him just because you put humanity on the spot because he got the disease, then how am I? I want to tell you the truth about you, but I can not afford the Rel, I'm afraid your feelings will change. If you used to love me with sincerely, I'm afraid if I tell you the same, you will love me with pity, I do not want to Rel.Bisikku slowly.
"Well Rails, I understand your condition at this time. And if I was in your position too, I will do the same." Ended me end by trying to bury the turmoil in the chest.
"Thanks Nis. I will always love you even if I have been with other people, but I will never love him as much as I love you." Farel said softly as he hugged me.
"Rails, I hope you'll never forget me" I pleaded with her.
"I promise Nis, I will never forget you. You mean and will always be carved in my heart." He said softly.
"Rails, I can know who the girl you choose is?" I asked in between my tears.
"For you what's not allowed" he jokes warmly.
"Yeah, I still have time to joke" I say pout.
"He is very close to you Nis" he replied calmly.
"Who?" I asked again.
"He's Asyifa," Farel said slowly.
I was struck by lightning in the hole when Farel said that name.Asyifa ... yes Asyifa is my best friend from kecil.Memang already this week he did not go to sekolah.Tapi .. But never crossed my mind that people who have been close to me suffer from sufficient disease terrible, the person who has become half my life actually had a relationship with my beloved, the person who every day became the foundation of all my grief when I was at odds with Farel would want Farel be his lover.Ya trials especially this why why Asyifa never told me about his illness I do not know how am I feeling this time.Marahkah or sadly? I am sad because my friend is being critical.But I also can not be angry at Asyifa so meaningful person in my life.
I'll be there. Dariku, Annisa Mar'atus Shalihah
"Why are you going as fast as this Nis," the man moaned as he hugged the tombstone bearing the name of Annisa Mar'atus Shalihah. The name of her immortal lover in her heart.
"I promise Nis, I will be eager to live my days ahead there though without you again. I will achieve my goals and make my parents happy. Is not that what you expect from me?"
"Farel, come home yuk" invite a woman who turned out to be Asyifa.
The man nodded slowly and stood up from his lover's grave.
"Annisa I love you" said the man as he walked away.
"Goodbye Nis ... no. Not goodbye but goodbye. Goodbye my brother, goodbye my best friend, goodbye kekasihku.Kita will keep walking together, though not bergandengan.Kau live your way and I will live jalanku.A still have to keep running though now you can no longer extend your hand when I fall down, though there will be no one else who will embrace me on this journey, even though you will not be able to support me when I am tired, though there will be no more beautiful smile that can make me strong. keep walking, looking ahead because my future awaits me. "Said the man as he walked away leaving behind a million memories that feel sad.
Annisa now has been embedded underground for ever. Leaving traces of fond memories in Farel's heart. His journey of life recorded a sacrifice of love for his best friend. For Farel, too far Annisa's departure from Farel's side. Travel Annisa gives a life lesson about the meaning of a friendship, romance and loving someone despite all the limitations.
** THE END **
