Life doesn't always make sense to the logical mind -- in reality it rarely does. Especially in today's world, we are crafting a reality out of nothing -- and at the same time we are working through these internal traumas that we have adopted.
Ultimately, there are a lot of people here on this planet who have been intentionally wounded. Our "slave masters" wanted us to be wounded -- once you have hurt someone they develop a "Trigger" which can then be more easily manipulated. This is how we are controlled.
The converse of this, is a healed human being -- the childish mindgames they play, with emphasis on childish, are simply this : find someones trigger, leverage it to create an emotional response and destabilize someone until they are more susceptible to outside influence. All of the propaganda / marketing that we are exposed to is guiding people into becoming economic slaves.
If someone is wounded and unfulfilled, the first things they will look for are : safety and satisfaction. If you give them "safety" (safety is always an illusion, lives impermance is enormous relative to our idea of being "save') they will cling to that and use all of their resources to create a temporary state of fulfillment OR a distraction from their lack of fulfillment.
So, with all of these people who have been emotionally traumatized, you have a massive group of people that are unable to really make decisions clearly and coherently. They are existing in a traumatized state where they : look outward to feel safe, use purchasing power to buy fulfillment through goods or experiences, and the whole time, never really realize that they are never solving the root problem.
The system is the problem. The system is set up to wound and continue to wound us ... once you realize this they key is stepping away for a period of time. You have to remove yourself from an unhealthy environment before you can imagine the possibility of being healthy. In a sick world it's insane not to be crazy.
So find your sanctuary, find your safe place, and be ... just be, for as long as you need. You are healing, and you will heal, but please don't force yourself to be healed. It will take time, I'm not sure how long, and the best thing you can do for yourself is to be gentle
