Children are like sponges they soak up everything around them and in their formative years it is the most important time to teach them right from wrong. The old nature vs nurture argument in that the environment we grow up in plays the biggest role in the development of a child and has the largest bearing on their future success.
Of course, there are many of us that endure hardship and come out the other end but we are far and few in-between. This is something I often reflect on with my own childhood and what I had around me at the time. An extremely abusive background, poverty and not much opportunity.
Generally, someone like that goes onto continue the cycle so the text books often suggest. But I still remember those years very well, they lit the fire in my belly because I knew what was happening was wrong. I don't know why I just knew deep down it wasn't right and I wanted more, I wanted better.
It's also why it is important to have positive role models to challenge children in harmful environments, so they see an opportunity and another way forward. It helps significantly in developing confidence, resilience and successful individuals.
Now I am not saying I have grown up perfectly in fact my past trauma has caused me to develop PTSD which has been a nightmare at times to live with. But as a 37 year old I have a decent grip on things and able to work full time in a high stress environment, contribute positively to society and engage in advocacy.
I try to be the best parent I can be and avoid shouting at my children unless danger is imminent. I do find if I am about to lose my cool I simply walk off and just ignore it. Kids will be kids, even if they have just smashed your favourite vase or T.V or made a mess just as you cleaned it. It's not their fault, they don't know better. Walk off and talk to them about why it was wrong after you have cooled down. There is no point trying to talk to a hyped up 6 and 3 year old if you're struggling to keep a lid on it.
But it is also why I have thrown myself into sports over the many years to get rid of a lot of my frustration and deal with my mental health.
This year I have embarked on positive role modelling for my children by having them get involved on a journey with me in Body Building. Having been training for many years me and the kids went heavy into training for state and national titles.
Both competitions I landed 5th which is an amazing feat for a first timer a really good achievement and the kids have really enjoyed watching me train, manage meals, practice and now compete on stage and win a place.
While it can seem quite selfish it is important to note that it shows my children that you need to work for things and that there are many other people in this world that are also committing to things. Putting in hard work and going out there and doing their best.
Throughout this, we have spent time at gyms, made new friends, established networks and even launched our very own health and sports nutrition business that is slowly growing. This showcases to the children that you can go out and do things. We have all been learning all together and I have even taken advice off my children in the business development.
so they get super excited when we do make a sale because it is something that they have worked on also and participated in. Yes I do share the profits with the children although I will need to set up a bank account for them soon. They always seem to want to "save some" but also buy lollies and chocolate. Which we also know we can't do.
All this is important especially for my next project that I want to venture into which will be men's health and youth. I want to build an organisation that deals with many of the issues we are currently facing in our community and works to a solution.
Over the next few months planning will begin to develop something I have been planning for years. To have my own organisation that helps people.
Let's do this!
