I was born into a family where we respect cultural differences. That is one major reason why none of my siblings ( 
Marriage, The First Eye Opener 👁
Like my dad, I have 'ear for languages'. Having gone to college (University as we call it in Nigeria) in Eastern Nigeria for my undergraduate and graduate studies in Anambra and Enugu State, I was very naive to think that I understand the culture of the Igbo people.
Credit image: Pinterest
A few years before I completed my graduate studies (M.Sc. Medical Biochemustry) from the University of Nigeria, Nsukka, I met Jude U. Onah and we got married in 2008 (10 years ago). The surname Onah is from Jude, since it is the general custom in Nigeria for a woman to bear her husband's name after marriage. My maiden name, Aburime, is typically Esan/Edo and both parents are from Esanland. A few years into my marriage, I began to understand in a difficult way that it is not just enough to understand, speak the language of others, eat their food, etc. Complete integration of another culture takes a long time. In my opinion, one might never really fully integrate. As shown in the image above, there are many aspects of culture; language and food are just a few of them.
Immigration, The Second Eye Opener 👁
I left home for graduate studies to pursue a doctoral degree in the Republic of Serbia. The first year was preparatory year to learn Serbian language /srpski jezik. Although, it was a very difficult language to learn and understand, I had no choice but to learn srpski. All lectures and almost all exams, except for 2 courses during my course work were taken in srpski. Of course, that is the language for instruction. After all these years of struggle in Serbia, my recent unpleasant experiences in the past months are pointers to the fact that it is not just enough to speak and understand the language of a people. Perhaps, it could take a decade (10 yrs) or more to integrate. Who has got that time to spend on studies?
Lessons Learnt
- There would be cultural conflicts, no matter how hard you try to avoid them.
- We should never believe that because we respect cultural differences, those with whom we relate would do same.
- Never think that because you speak the language of a people (different from your mother tongue) and have lived among them for several years you understand their culture.
Many thanks to all those who remembered me on my birthday (17th of April).
Original photoshot of me on my birthday