That particular day, I was having a very important task at work, my manager had entrusted me with the work, and it was something that could possibly lead to me getting promoted. Some top officials from the headquarter would be present virtually as well. I got up from my bed, said my prayers, rehearsed a little in front of the mirror, picked up my already ironed clothes, and polished my shoes. I had planned to give it my very best.
I looked at my clothes that were already laid in the bed, neat and shiny. I looked at those shoes and already imagined myself in them and presenting. Not only that, but I already knew my dressing would give me a 100/100. But then, I remembered my boxer. I quickly rushed into the bathroom to check, and guess what? It was still wet. All my boxers were worn out, so I bought some new pairs the day before, and as for my attitude. I usually wash anything I just bought—clothes, singlets, trousers, pants, and all. I would make sure to wash them before putting them on. That was the one issue and disaster I was having. I would have managed to wear the old ones and spray the hell out of them with perfumes, but then, I had trashed and burned them immediately I got home. I stared at those boxers, and they stared back at me. Not only that, but I probably can't wear wet underwear, and also, I can't go out without putting one on.
I panicked; my mind kept racing. What can I do? What excuse can I give? Can I just say it's due to a power outage or traffic or some family emergencies? I don't know, and all of those sound too common. I need something that would sound convincing.
I was still lost in thought when my phone rang, and guess what? It was my manager. Immediately, I picked it up, more like I was programmed to answer it without thinking.
I didn't even allow him to talk or bother greeting him before I blurted out, "Sir, I will be a little late....an unforeseen circumstance just showed up, sir, and I really need to resolve it, sir.”
*“Unforeseen circumstance?” he repeated.
"Yes, sir, it's an emergency, sir, a domestic one, and a very delicate and personal one at that, as it revolves around my dignity, sir."
I didn't hear him say anything else; more like he paused to wrap his head around what I was saying. I dropped the call and knew it had worked; the fact that I mentioned "delicate," "emergency," and "dignity" made it sound serious, even if it's not convincing enough.
I quickly rushed into the bathroom, picked up those boxers, and took them out to spread on the spreading wire. I was begging the sun to come out while. Likewise, I kept pacing back and forth while whispering some prayers to God to please allow for a miracle before my career died.
A few minutes later, they were still wet, but then light came. I was so glad I picked one of the boxer up, rushed in, placed it directly opposite my standing fan and out in the fan, and then I dashed out to collect my iron from my neighbor who borrowed it. I went in, plugged in the iron, ironed my boxers, dressed up, and dashed out. If you see the way I was running, it was as if I escaped the den of kidnappers.
There was a little traffic, but then the bike I took tried its possible best to navigate its way through. I dropped a few poles at my workplace, paid the bike man, and ran all the way. I had planned to kill it with my dressing first, but then I looked shabby already, my shirt was not really well in, I didn't comb my hair, but then I just straightened a few things and walked in with a smile.
"Good morning ladies and gentlemen, I tender my apologies for keeping you waiting. It was a bit of an emergency, but I am good now."
Later that day, I told my colleagues the main reason behind my lateness. I told them it was because of my wet boxers. Come and see the way they were all laughing; my manager even held on to his tummy as if it was going to protrude out more..."You mean your wet boxers were the delicate and personal emergency...or what excuse did you give..."
The story of my wet boxers spread like wildfire; people still tease me up until now. If my wet boxers were what made me late each time I didn't arrive early, some would even ask to check if it was wet boxers I wore to work.
So, that was the weirdest excuse I ever gave.
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