So, I had this fear in me sometimes ago, and it's one I've been able to improve on now. Anytime I'm in class and a lecturer ask a question, immediately he/she points at me to answer it, my heart will start beating as if.....and it's not because I don't know it, no, it's because I'm scared. Even if I'm not being pointed at, my heart will just beating and I will pray he/she wouldn't point at me.
While on the other hand, I find out I deliver well in some other things that even most times have lot's of people in attendance. I'm talking about acting. During my stay on campus, acting was one of the things I did most. I was a drama member in my fellowship, I was the drama coordinator in my departmental fellowship and I was also the asst drama coordinator at the institute level, while still belonging to some other drama ministries outside of campus too.
I don't know if to call it fear of crowd, but I think that is what it is. But when it's time to act, I deliver whatever role I'm being giving very well. I wouldn't be scared or shiver or even stutter, except the script requires that I do. It's more like there's a different spirit that switches place inside of me when it's time to act. Cause when I'm out of character and in class, I find it hard to even talk or deliver a seminar topic I had studied and work so well on.
And to be honest with you, I thought of what I could do, cause it confused me too, how that I can act before hundreds of people yet fear a presentation session in my classroom. I can't say I fear my class mates or lecturers, cause most of them are most times present at this various drama programs of ours and I deliver well.
And that was when it hit me, while acting my focus is always on delivering the message. I forget myself and get lost in the character. In reality, I'm the shy type and that's what follows me to lectures, it while acting I take off that shyness and deliver whatever I'm supposed too. I see it as me serving a purpose.
That was how I began to help myself. I began participating in other things in church aside acting, in class I started volunteering to be the group leader for presentations and such too. Anytime I'm having a class presentation or stuff, I told myself I'm going on stage to act and I must deliver. I take off they shyness and see myself on stage delivering and focusing on the message and not the crowd. And it did work, at first it wasn't so perfect and all, but along the line, I improved.
So, tryna look inwards, that thing you find yourself doing without fear can possibly be applied or work for that area which you feel weak/lacking.
馃尮
Images are mine.
Thanks a lot for taking your time to read through, kindly do well to stop by my blog 
鉂ｏ笍鉂ｏ笍鉂ｏ笍
