Hello!!! I’m back for a second entry. I’ve been on hiatus since my first steemit entry due to some personal matters I needed to attend. It’s my first time in 11 years to be jobless. I’ve been working since I was 19 and recently stopped to focus on my two boys. I just wanted to voice out my sentiments. I believe that this is a good channel for it.
Lately, I’ve been having maudlin thoughts and didn’t feel like doing anything. There were lots of ideas and feelings that were kept deep inside and it felt like they were so suppressed I cannot even begin to express them. I’ve got a lot of time to spare now yet I don't know what to do with it. It felt like I am in a place that I’m not used to being there before. This idle time, if not used productively, may result to feelings of frustration and dissatisfaction. It makes me to think of negative situations especially that I have planned out things that were not brought to fruition. And this scares me big time.
My friends would ask me how am I. I can’t even answer that I’m okay. But I couldn’t explain to them the actual emotions and where they are rooting from. Im trying, hoping, and praying that I can crawl out of this pit of emotions so I can be a better mom or even be a better version of myself.
I know life, per se, is a challenge. It’s full of unpredictable things. And if didn't happen the way we envision it, frustration kicks in. I know I wanted more out of my life but can’t even begin to realise where to start. I am confused. I know other people may be going through a more challenging time than I am but I just wanted to share this. I just want to leave this out here and maybe, just maybe, someone went through the same phase, overcame it and could offer a sound advice. For now, I’ll just hope and pray that this too shall pass.
Photo Credit: http://www.zenthinking.net
