How do you channel your frustration?

Good Morning!

This morning, I went to the grocery store and found out that the store put the wrong label on the price of an item. After paying for them, I just realized the thing that I thought was cheap turned out to be expensive. I got slightly annoyed but I couldn’t complain since the queue was too long and I got the stare of “ move away, it’s my turn and be fast!”. So, I went home annoyed and I felt like I was on the verge of a breakdown. In the past, whenever I felt that way and my anger/ frustration level was way up, I usually ate to numb my feelings and so that I wouldn't lash out or said things I didn’t mean to. Strangely, these days I picked up a new way to deal with that.

Welcome to my brain dump, it’s morning and when I am able to sit down, sipping a cup of coffee while contemplating about life and emptying it out a little.

Cleaning is my go-to channel for channeling my anger and frustration. It is therapeutic and a lot more productive than what I used to do. Since moving here, I got frustrated with a lot of things and not knowing where to start but today I saw the light. There are so many things to fix including the balcony, the room I stayed at, some places that needed new furniture and even the roofs that needed to be fixed. Today, I decided I would clean my balcony and also my bathroom. Long story short, I did it.

The house I am living in is pretty old. It is even older as my mom and the last renovation happened around 15 years ago. So, there are many models of the house that are outdated and such a hassle to clean. For example the bathroom isn’t using a shower but it has this water basin that are made with ceramics. On top of that, the water in our place is something called “hard” water and it’s causing so much trouble to clean especially when the stain doesn't go away that easily. The only thing that worked is citric acid solution and the ceramic looks clean and almost brand new.

After spending my energy on cleaning, I didn’t feel that angry or frustrated anymore. In fact, I was a lot more cheerful and even more motivated to tackle and clean the house. My humble shack needed a lot of work and cleaning is basically the first step to it. I will show you the balcony update later but I am pretty proud that I finally picked up something to clean.

I suppose, growing older I do enjoy smaller houses just because they are easy to clean. However, I understand when people want a big house, maybe they have a bigger family and need many rooms. I think most people don’t factor in cleaning because a bigger house can also mean bigger expenses on maintaining and cleaning. Now, though I have my own place, cleaning the whole house will definitely take so much time. And to tackle that, I made this an hour to an hour and half cleaning schedule and hopefully by June, I can start gardening and actually comfortably living in this new space.

Well, I gotta go make more coffee. See you around!