Very interesting take on the idea of a lost soul. I have written a poem entitled that in the past, which I will share with you down below, but first, my thoughts on the poem.

There is a fine mix of subjective struggles being expressed here and objective, harsh truths about feeling lost and broken. The theme of alcoholism finds its way into here aswell, and this starts off the latter part of the poem which I believe lacks density. A lot is said about what the man feels and how he reacts to the feelings, but we seldom actually meet the feelings and come face-to-face with that which is causing all of this. The opening stanza is close to perfect in my eyes; precise, cohesive and straight to the point, yet this drags on throughout the poem as if the whole thing is a build up to a climax which never comes... Despite all of that, I really enjoyed the poem and all it has to offer. This kind of topic is immensely hard to express, especially in words, since the core of feeling lost is difficult to pinpoint, but I think you did a great job!

Thank you for sharing, and I would now like to invite you to take a look at my poem.

lost soul

just another lost soul
in a world that's burning and is black as coal.
and i've lost all control
over my dead body that i drag on. i’m

i’m incapable of dealing with this pain.
any way to pull my eyelids down
and throw me in the ground?
i just know if i was found dead
there would be no sound.
only laughter and talking.
that is all i hear while i am out sleepwalking.
because this all just feels like a dream.
and i know that i seem like

just another lost soul
in a world that's burning and is black as coal.
and i've lost all control
over my dead body that i drag on. i’m

dying.

i meant i’m
crying,
dying,
sighing,
lying.

Cheers, and once again, thanks!

Lukasz.