If everyone around you says something is right, but your conscience tells you it is wrong, which one would you listen to?
This question has been on my mind since I saw this week's Hive Reach Out prompt on Moral.
Have you ever noticed how society can judge the same action differently depending on who does it?
Take cheating in relationships, for example.
In our Nigerian society, when a woman cheats, the judgment can be brutal. Everyone suddenly becomes a moral police. She may quickly be labelled unfaithful, disrespectful, shameless, or even told that she has destroyed her home.
But when a man cheats, we often hear things like:"He's a man."
"Men are like that."
"It's in their nature."
"At least he came back home."
Some time ago, I was scrolling through facebook, saw videos of a man smoking, I went through the comment section, it was all "love and light". But there was a girl that smoked too, and the comment section was so judgemental. She was even called exhaust..
And somehow, an action that would be condemned in a woman becomes something society expects us to tolerate in a man.
But if something is wrong, shouldn't it be wrong regardless of who does it?
This is where the question of morality becomes interesting for me.
Growing up in Nigeria, many of us learn our values from our parents, elders, culture, religion, and community. Society teaches us what is acceptable and what isn't.
But society can also have double standards.
And sometimes, “that's how things have always been” becomes an excuse for behaviour we should actually be questioning.
For me, society can teach me values, but my conscience should still have the courage to examine them. Yes
If cheating hurts a woman, it should also matter when a man does it.
If dishonesty is wrong when a poor person does it, it shouldn't suddenly become acceptable because a wealthy person does it.
If disrespect is wrong when directed at one person, it shouldn't become right simply because the other person is more powerful, or because the other person is an adult.
Morality shouldn't change according to gender, status, wealth, age, or social position.
Of course, I also believe conscience isn't automatically perfect. Our conscience is shaped by our upbringing, experiences, culture, and beliefs. Sometimes, what feels “normal” to us deserves to be questioned too.
Maybe that's why I don't think morality should be determined entirely by society.
Society gives us the values we inherit.
Conscience gives us the opportunity to question them.
And perhaps real moral growth begins when we stop asking, “What will people say?” and start asking:
“If the roles were reversed, would I still consider this right?”
Because imagine being surrounded by people who are doing something wrong. If everyone is doing it, does that suddenly make it right?
I believe morality is tested most when there is no audience.
When nobody will praise you for being honest.
When nobody will know that you cheated.
Thanks for stopping by my blog today..
Do have a purpose driven day ahead.
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