Your final wondering is really delightful - whatever the sacred invisible power is, it's undefined quality helped draw this piece together (although, the wondering of it being a dream was perhaps not as picturesque).

In your piece, you cover a lot of ground - and the story reads like the recount of something that happened. I do wonder whether you'd be better slowing down and really colouring in your story with vivid imagery and details - that the beauty of the final lines be an extension of what had been established the whole way through.

Tim