There was a time my fire looked wild. I had big dreams and I chased everything with reckless hope. I was outspoken, set apart from my friends by my sparks. I was the teachers' pet. I burned bright, but then, I also burned out.
There's this thing where people expected so much from me, and I suddenly wanted to be freed from all that. Burning bright also resulted in me never taking a breather. My wins were celebrated tremendously, but my losses were rebuked just as sharply. Being in the spotlight gave me no time to be simply a human, a human with flaws just like everyone else.
I could feel a shift in my energy the moment I left my High School days behind and entered University. I was simply tired of having to live up to people's expectations. I simply wanted to live for myself. I wanted to have flaws without every finger pointing at my forehead. So I avoided every spotlight as long as I could help it.
I haven't lost my fire at all. It still burns, but my flames are quieter and steadier. They don’t burn to light up the world of the people who expected things from me. My flames only burn to keep me warm.
Even though my fire feels different, I'm not afraid. I'm not explosive anymore and that's because my flames only stay close to my heart, healing me, inspiring me and warming me in the coldest moments of my life. I'm okay as long as these flames are not consuming me to ashes.
Your flames change shape and soften, and that's totally fine too. Because you're still burning, and that's what matters the most.
Thanks for reading!
Images are mine.
