Failing to fulfill a promise affects me emotionally. I do all I can to avoid making a promise to someone. I prefer to do things as surprises. It's more painful to me when I make a promise to someone and I fail to fulfill and the person prefers not to talk about it to know your reasons. In such a case you can't really predict what they might have concluded in their mind.
Some years ago, I worked with a friend in a school as a teacher. The school was an average private school in Nigeria where workload doesn't commensurate with the remuneration. Many times, we used to discuss securing better opportunities so that we can live a better life.
After about a year together in the school, he got a job in a bigger private school. It was a multiple step forward. The pay was incomparable. I celebrated the development with him.
When success knocks at the door of your friend, it's getting closer to your door. In some cases, the friend may even be one to show the "success" your door so that it can extend the knocking to your door.
This exactly was the case. About a year after my friend started in his new school, he invited me to apply for a vacant teaching position. He recommended me to the school authority and I was invited for an interview. I did the interview and I was hired.
The day I went to the school to collect the appointment letter remains one of the happiest days of my life.
Immediately I collected the letter, I headed straight to my sister's shop to inform her of the good news. She prayed for me and joined me to celebrate the appointment. My sister was instrumental in seeing me finish my degree. She sacrificed a lot for me not to drop out of school after the death of my father who was the breadwinner of the family.
About four months after starting the job, my sister fell sick. Her sickness coincided with the wedding planning of my friend.
The news of the wedding was a great one and I was willing to play an important role for my benefactor. My friend formed a WhatsApp group and he added his friends including me. A few weeks later, members of the group were made to donate any amount that was within one's capacity to the proposed wedding expenses. Some people made outright donations while others were promising in their numbers.
Around that period, my sister's sickness was becoming serious. Almost everyone in our family was committing his or her finances into payment of the hospital bills. All we wanted was to see my bedridden sister back to her feet. It was difficult to donate for my friend's wedding or to make a substantial promise. However, in order not to be seen as an ungrateful soul, I promised a certain amount of money.
When it was time for the wedding, I couldn't fulfill my promise because my sister's situation was getting worse. I attended the wedding and supported in a little way. Though I informed my friend of my sister's sickness, he didn't quite understand with me the severity of the ailment. The way he related with me on the wedding day showed that he was disappointed. On my own part, I wish I could fulfill my promise but my lovely sister was in a situation that required my help and indeed any other person's help.
A few weeks after the wedding, we lost my sister. It was a painful experience. I informed my friend of the death and perhaps he understood better how severe the sickness was before claiming her life.
Though we still communicate, I spotted a strain in our relationship. Sincerely I wish I could do better but the means wasn't just there.
