I had this similar experience many years back.
It seems like I was always the one to turn to for a helping hand.
Need advice?
Call me. Need a loan, a ride, to vent or just a shoulder to cry on?
I was always available and never second-guessed; I believed friendship and relationships are all about trust, respect and doing favors out of love and support.
Somehow it began to strike me. Most of those people conveniently disappeared when I needed assistance the most. Messages go unread; calls not returned; so many excuses.
It begins to make me think - are my friends so interested in me, or the things I can provide for them? It hurt, of course but, it taught me a valuable lesson: People who care about you genuinely would ask you about yourself and your life even if they needed nothing from you. They would continue to care, continue to engage with you and continue to be the kind of supportive friend one hopes for even after you no longer have any favours to share.
Of course, a great friendship does involve helping each other out..
There is nothing fundamentally wrong with being a friend in deed or even with being of service – that is all perfectly well and fine. It simply begins to border on a problem the minute your worth hinges solely on your utility
. It sounds too cliché to hear again but we are more than the favours we’re able to provide for everyone around us. Our worth is simply tied to who we are, not what we do.
Even so, this experience was enough of a push to look at my self.
Am i more of a beneficiary type of friend?
I also make sure to establish and guard my boundaries because it can also be draining if I am constantly giving. Those that have had me through both times, I cherish you forever, and that’s the kind of friend i aspire to be for others.
The relationship should be tested for this: “Would I miss this person If I had nothing to give her and vice versa?”. Cause real friends stay and love us for whom we are not the benefits we bring.
#friendship #love
#indiaunited #ecency #life #hive #hiveph #philipppines #ladiesofhive