I'm having an indefinite hush. It's a nuisance that I don't know, why I can't understand, and that I can't overcome it as you can imagine. Maybe I wouldn't say that, actually, I'm looking for new troubles because I'm afraid of being happy, who knows?
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I've never thought that one might fear happiness. How bad would it all be if you didn't even have the slightest thing to spoil your happiness?
I'm not crying as I write these lines, because I don't think a bodily contact is absolutely necessary to make a person suffer concrete, on the other hand, I don't think I'm happy either. I'm afraid to be one of the people I slowly criticize.
When this change, which is now quite painful, is finally a passive member of society and nature, and I am going to be a shallow person who interprets what is going on around them as far as they hear, see and understand. I know it's in my hands to stop and stop this flow.
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But the real problem is, I don't want to do anything to stop this transition, as the faithful people who do everything their normal course to experience their destiny, though they do it because they are divine orders.
At first, I thought a lot about how people could be so indifferent to themselves and to others and how they could live their lives in a rather shallow way, and the most logical explanation I could find on this subject is that they lack the ability and courage to change things, rather than the goal of realizing their selves.
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