Phobia

It wasn’t a very good week for me.
This consecutive days I got insect bites from the cat at our dorm.
Just every morning I wake up there’s cluster of itchy bites all over my feet.
And it just happen also to be the week of my exams and other stuff to be busy for.
However I was startled and tired and annoyed cuz there’s bugs biting me and I can’t do anything about it.

Instead of being busy about other things, I’m bothered of the itchiness and just feels really annoying, and I’m feeling that I rant a lot already but please let me be. :(

I really had phobia to cat or dog lice.
For others it’s just a kind of discomfort, for me it reminds me of the childhood days that I don’t want to remember.

It’s a kind of memory that’s too sad that you only want it to be kept on a corner of your mind.
Just everytime I remember my 9-year old self,
First time being in a place I never known,
Cold and sad and depressing,
Too young to be that sad.

Those cat/dog lice had been my worst memories.
Those days were part of my childhood, when we first moved to the phillipines.

My dad was unemployed at that time and we just loan a good amount for our ticket and also our daily living. After living in a good place for quite sometime and he can’t afford so he decided to cut our expenses by moving to a new place near our school.

We lived in an apartment, maybe not to call it a slum but there’s really a lot of stray dogs in that area.
I still remember there’s a river full of garbage and foul odor.

The smokes of old jeepney, our area is really near the jeepney station. I was really culture shocked.

Our family wasn’t the wealthy rich in Vietnam but I did live a comfortable life. I didn’t know why we have to move to another place to live this way.

I mean, my parents family and relatives had personal issues with each other so my father decided to bring us to another country.

I remember I don’t usually can sleep at night due dogs barking until 5 am.
At every morning our whole legs are full of dog lice bites.

But we lived like that for half a year.
🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂

Let’s skip some of the parts and go to the present time.
I’m a very hardworking person, and the reason I’m that way, because I don’t want to live like that ever again, or let my future kids suffer what Ived suffered.

I’ve started working since 2nd year college.
It’s really difficult to find jobs if you’re a foreigner in the Phils.
Unlike countries like western areas, foreign students can still work at a coffee shop and earn some good bucks for their expenses, I, at that time couldn’t.

I started go tutoring with very low salary(1 usd per hour) and even go for jobs at service crew for a korean restaurant(the owner just let me work illegally part time)

And some years later, maybe the heavens was touched by my will to go on whatever it takes, I fortunately meet a business man in Vietnam and he hires me for his online business since I’m fluent in Filipino language, and he’s extending the market to this area,

Truth be told I was about to stop college for a while and work to shoulder my expenses because our financial situation wasn’t really good. I don’t want to spend my dads money, cuz I’m guilty about it.

But a month after that decision I was hired, so it saved me from the situation and I did continue schooling while working.

I was always grateful because life never gave up on me.

Anyway, to end it here.. anyone knows what’s the cure for cat lice bites? :(