When the Apostle Paul wrote this passage using the Greek word 'agape' meaning sacrificial Love. Not 'phileo' as in brotherly love, or "eros' as in sexual love but Agape. So even if we don't feel like loving our spouse we choose to love despite how we feel at that heated moment. We humble ourselves in that so lay the opportunity to resolve the issue immediately rather than let it fester and accumulate in your relationship.