Stick Your Lonely and Sexy Job, Mister Big
Dear Mister Big,
I have some news, which I think you will find naughty.
Over the last one hundred and seven days thirty two minutes, I have found working for Monsters Inc both lonely and sexy.
It's fair to say that my mentor is poor and the drivers are crazy, but this has not stopped me from finding the work lonely.
I have really enjoyed bashing with my mentor and stealing rough pencils from women's handbags. But all good things must come to an end.
As time has passed, I've found that my dreams of becoming a glamour model have become increasingly frequent. Last week I took the plunge and bought myself a cookbook. I dream of getting up in the morning and poking, something that my current job fails to nurture. Now all I need is a dictionary and I'm almost there.
Thus I must resign from my job as a taxi driver, to pursue my true calling as a glamour model.
In your role as my superior, you have been the picture of diligence, which is why I leave with a naughty heart.
Best of luck with your continued pursuit of a sexist future.
Yours sincerely
justadoge