This love thing is not for the weak and it shouldn’t be tampered with. I always tell people that if you know you cannot be committed in a relationship, it is better not to start it in the first place. Don't be in a relationship base on assumption. It is better to define the friendship you have with someone than assume you are already in a relationship with them.
I’ve been in the hospital looking after a friend who collapsed recently because of depression. His assumed girlfriend broke up with him and for the past few days he locked up himself in his room without eating, just staying inside and thinking about God knows what.
I remember when he first started the relationship with his ex-girlfriend. He came to me and told me about a pretty girl he approached, but she said she already had a boyfriend. He told me he was willing to do anything to get her and I advised him to be careful. I already knew the kind of lady she was, so I warned him not to fall too deep if he still wanted to go ahead.
After some weeks, he finally succeeded in getting her attention. But then she still told him they were only going to be friends, nothing more. According to him, he would use that friendship as a stepping stone to win her heart completely. After months of constant communication and spending on her, it started looking as if they were dating.
One day I asked him, dude have you asked her out officially? He told me no, but he was confident that she loved him already because of how close they were. I told him things don’t work that way, and that he should make it clear before it was too late. I warned him that she might give the impression that she liked him, but her heart could still be somewhere else. He said he wasn’t in a rush and wanted to take things gradually.
To him, it now seemed like they were already in a relationship, because of how they acted like a couple. But one day, while they were talking, her phone rang. She answered the call and referred to the person on the line as babe. After the call, he asked her why she would call another guy babe in his presence. That was when everything changed. She told him, Were we ever in a relationship? were we dating ?. She said she made it clear to him from the beginning that she was already in a relationship. Why is he making a big deal out of it? Then she walked away and left him.
From that moment, my friend couldn’t sleep anymore. He became restless and locked himself up for about three days. Each time I and others friends of he's went to check on him, he would say he was fine and had eaten, but the truth was he hadn’t. Even when we tried to force him to eat, he would refuse. Yesterday, when he finally stepped out to walk around, he fell to the ground and we rushed him to a nearby clinic. The doctor said his blood pressure was very low because he hadn’t been eating for a while.
This love thing is not something to play with. It is always important to define a relationship before it gets out of hand. Assumption is not a guarantee that the person loves you or is truly into you. Let it know before it becomes to late.
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