Timestamps

All timestamps are generally in Pacific Standard Time (PST) or Pacific Daylight Time (PDT) unless otherwise noted.

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Hanna

2020-08-14 - Friday - 01:07 AM - 01:56 AM - Hanna 208

Clara meets her mother at the age of like 22, like for the first time ever. Epic hug left me in tears.

General Shepherd

02:02 AM - “Stop Civil War 2” Emergency Broadcast - 8/13/20

2020 Trump Landslide. However, Election Fraud Against Patriotism is on the rise like never before. So, let people know how many millions of dead people do in fact vote. Election meddling is huge. So, what are you going to do about it? They're trying to steal it from America.

Idioms & Puns

05:42 PM - Animal Puns

What are your favorite animal puns?

Make like a Joey, a baby kangaroo, and hop on out of here
Make like a bear and get me some money
Sounds kind of fishy
Crabs don't give to charity because they're shellfish
Paws what you're doing and get on over here
Don't have a cow
Hold your horses
You eat like a pig
You eat like a horse
Make like a tree and leaf
Make like a banana and split
Gopher a drink
I'm losing my marbles
Make like a baby and head out
You can't teach an old dog new tricks
Why didn't anyone believe the tiger? Because they thought he was lion.
What did the dolphin say when he was confused? I'm sorry, can you be more Pacific.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear.
What was said during the feline couple's argument? "You're such a cheetah!""No, you're lion!"
Why did the leopard hate playing Hide and Seek? Because he was always spotted!
What's the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish!
Why did the eagle get arrested for stealing from the doctor? It was ill-eagle.
What do you call it when a cat wins first place at a dog show? A cat-has-trophy!

40 Animal Puns that will quack you up!

Why are most horses so slim? Because they are on a stable diet!

A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was ticketed for littering.

I watched a documentary about beavers last night. It was the best dam show ever!
A man was hospitalized with 6 plastic horses inside him. The doctor described his condition as stable!
When Noah was loading the ark, where did he put the bees? In the ark-hives!

What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.

Have you ever heard of an honest cheetah?
Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.

Some sad things can happen in states that are blue.

Pig puns are so boaring.
Which day do chickens hate the most? Friday.

The best way to communicate with fish is to drop them a line
When I asked my dog how his day was he said it was rough.

I've got a chicken-proof front lawn. It's impeccable!
What city has the largest rodent population? Hamsterdam

How does a farmer count cows? With a cow-culator
Cuddling a cat usually leaves you feline good.
The duck was in rehab because he was a quackaddict.
A bear was killing moose for entertainment but in the end he wasn't amoosed.
I hate insects, they really bug me.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A Thesaurus.
My friend was annoying me with bird puns but toucan play this game.
We call our dog Rolex, since he’s a watchdog.
What would bears be without bees? Ears.
Early bird gets the worm

8 Ways to Have Internet

1. WIFI from the phone
2. Ethernet Cable
3. Ethernet Over Telephone
4. Ethernet Over Coaxial
5. Ethernet Over Powerline
6. Blutooth
7. WIFI in general
8. Fiber Optics

DMZ

I like Pslams 119:105
I like picking berries
Rap
Run
High ground reference
Kenobi in Winnie the Pooh
Spider fill in the blank song
TMNT but add your name to the end
Lion den
Karaoke
Think like a winner
Careful what you say philosophy
Found a board
Good for the printer
Not down under in Australia, a pool, extension, sort of, under the closet stand, winnie again oh no silly pooh bear, stuffed. Crisp blackberry treat. Ethernet over Coaxial working. Other tests ongoing. Reading joke books. Read an adventure book with like cats and super heroes or something for like a minute.

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