For a long time, I’d dreaded my friends’ birthdays almost as much as I dreaded mine. Mine was luckily at the beginning of the year so it was easy to get it over with so I could focus on how my friends’ birthdays would go. And it was simply because I didn’t know what to gift them. I had that problem for a long while. I thought the easy way out was to give them just cash gifts. But then I realized how shallow that was, and if I’m being honest, quite insensitive. Because it felt like I didn’t care enough to think of something thoughtful to give them.
I have very few friends and as expected, they all have their different personalities. Just one of my close friends has a minimalist lifestyle. And since I abolished that school of thought that cash gifts were the best gifts to give friends since I would potentially escape giving them something that they wouldn’t like or appreciate, it has been easier but still much harder to give even her gifts on her birthdays.
But to be candid, when I pick out gifts for her, I don’t exactly put into perspective the fact she has minimalist tendencies nor do I distinctly keep the peculiarities of my other friends as the prime factor. I think when giving birthday gifts, and if you’re trying to be thoughtful about it, you need to get out of your head and maybe channel your thinking into the heart of the person you want to give. Imagine the squeals and shrieks of excitement they’d have or the sincere bear hugs they’d give and of course, in accordance with what you can afford, pick out something.
My Mom’s birthday is eleven days from mine. And once the rollercoaster of emotions that came with mine had passed, I thought of what I’d give her that would truly make her smile. I’ve not been so great at giving her gifts and I wanted this year to be different, even though, for the first time ever I would not be at home on her birthday because of school.
I thought about the things she usually talked about and the things she needed. My Mom is a really conscientious person and quite simple in nature. She exemplifies minimalism in so many ways, but more than anything, she’s extremely industrious. I don’t personally know that many people who work as hard as she does. She’s what you’d call a workaholic, cause even when we practically force her to take a rest, you’d hear(while lying down), listing the things she’d do once she got up.
And so while thinking of what I'd get her and this memory came to me, I smiled because I’d figured out what her gift from me would be. I wasn’t sure what my sisters had planned so, my first honour to her was coming back home, specially for her birthday. And on that day, in the midst of the little home celebration we had for her, I announced that I’d booked a spa treatment for her(deep tissue massage and everything in between). The look on her face was priceless and crystalized in my heart forever.
And so I said to myself that this is how I want all the people I care about to feel. The knowledge that I’d do my best to gift something memorable, or at least would benefit them profoundly. The topic of this week’s #KISS is:
What do you feel is the best birthday gift to give a fellow minimalist?
And I think the answer to that is to gift them something that connects with them. We can’t exactly know the deepest needs of a person, and maybe even if we do, there’s still the question of our ability, financially or otherwise, to give it. But we could give them something lasting.
Because at the end of the day, the whole concept of minimalism is about thoughtfulness in simplicity. So you’re not going to give something shallow because they love to live simply, but something that even though it doesn’t cost an arm and a leg, at least reaches deep and makes them smile whenever they see it or recollect it. That’s the beauty of minimalism. That we think, not just simple, but thoughtful.
Image is mine.
