Great deed done by your friend. this is how it ought to be in that situation you where facing. if your friend would have given you the money. He would have only succeeded in making you dependent on him and which wouldn't actually solve all of your problems. This is infact the reason, I would rather prefer having certain access to information than being giving money (in fact I do my best never accept money from anyone no matter the situation I face)

another means of how to know people's need so as to help them in a best way is to PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOE.

That is another nice perspective, putting yourself into their shoes, this will certainly help in understanding what actually what's the best way to solving people's current problem. some problems require giving money, some require access to the right information, some just encouragement and advice. Different situation require different solution and form of help. The reason is it important to first understand the predicament of the individual.

with this few point of mine i think i should be able to answer a little of the question,

Of course. I believe you have really well has your great points gave me more insight and understanding to viewing this whole thing. You made it's kind of comprehensive at the end of the day which is quite great. Nice one from you taking your time to dissect this and talk deeply into this question being raised