Society has stereotypes about its own people, we're like slaves, doing everything we can to reduce the pressure of societal expectations. At least, that's what I think, if I was born as the president I would be expected to rule and lead my people. But instead I was born blind and partly deaf.
Welcome to my world.
Every morning at the crack of dawn, I wake up to my own darkness. Sometimes, it feels lighter but other times, it just feels like waking up blindfolded. By now, I've grown used to the sensation. I rely on my other senses, smell, taste and occasionally hearing, but I don't rely on that part too much without my hearing aids.
I tried to live like any decent human being, but the truth is, people like me don't get by without assistance. I dare to say I'm not quite fit for the word normal even among those disabled like myself.
Born with congenital deaf-blindness, I came into this world with my disabilities, I think my parents couldn't handle them, so they left me in front of an orphanage. I grew up feeling different, left out and often bullied by my peers.
But I still manage to have friends, friends that have been my guide till this very day.
“Oh chef!.” I already knew who it was from their scent, I felt my hands being pulled out and my chief hat was placed on my hands. We have this so many times that I have become accustomed to the way my friend greets me.
“Hello Annabelle.” I said as I pulled her into a hug. Annabelle and Felix have been my childhood friends. They had helped me, believed in me, encouraged me and through those dark and scary moments in my life I had a hand or two to hold me and reassure me that everything was going alright.
“ Where’s Felix?.” I inquired, frowning at the thought of him not being here. But then, I felt a hand tracing letters on my palms and my smile grew.
“I A-M H-E-R-E. H-E-L-L-O, J-E-S-S-I-C-A.”
My excitement had skyrocketed, the plan was to invite them over so we could have a peaceful dinner. Felix had been working super hard so he rarely found time to visit me, unlike Annabelle, who was my next-door neighbor. We practically grew up together as sisters.
My dream was to be the best chef, despite my disabilities. It stemmed from the countless times my friend and I went hungry at the orphanage, and goodness, their food was terrible.The first time I had a truly good meal, my dream was born into reality.
With Annabelle by my side, we have won 6 awards in less than 2 years since we opened our business.
Our sponsor was Felix, he was fortunate to be adopted into a wealthy family, his adopted parents passed away, they left their entire fortune to him.
“So what's for dinner chef?.” Annabelle used the print-on-palm to communicate to me, though it actually feels like this ‘S-O, W-H-A-T F-O-R D-I-N-N-E-R C-H-E-F-?’ I still try to imagine it in her actual voice.
“Lob-stuh bink, rich and creamy.” I attempted saying, and also conveying the message through print-on-palm, carefully spelling the words on Annabelle’s hands. Lobster Bisque (Rice And Creamy), I wasn't completely fluent with big words, but my speech therapist encouraged me to keep trying even if they were not pronounced correctly.
Lobster bisque was one of those expensive looking soups, because of how rich and creamy it was. I have practiced so many times that I knew the recipe by heart and it also happened to be one of Felix’s favorite dishes.
The ingredients includes; lobster meat, shallots, garlic, white wine, butter, tomato paste, brandy, seafood stock, thyme, paprika and lastly cream.
Annabelle and Felix were up with the task of doing the side sides, we had garlic bread and oyster crackers for dipping into bisque, we had grilled shrimp or scallops, which was (light and flavorful). And then to balance the meal, we had citrus fennel salad. And just for the occasion, we enjoyed a bottle of Chardonnay, my favorite wine.
So in less than 5 hours, we had finished cooking, and the lobster bisque smelled incredible, which meant I really did well with the ingredients. and having extra hands in the kitchen really made everything a lot easier. Within 15 minutes, the table was set and we were all seated around the dining table.
Thanks to my hearing aids, I could hear Felix saying grace, though his voice sounded distant, I was still able to catch some of his words.
We ate in comfortable silence, Annabelle feeding me out of habit. She was like a mother hen, feeding and protecting me in the orphanage. Back then, I was often bullied by my peers, they would always steal my meal for the day, leaving me hungry, sometimes they would replace my food with something inedible.
But everything changed when I became friends with Felix and Annabelle, the bullying lessened. Felix would often chase away my tormentors, while Annabelle stayed by myself, making sure I ate before she could touch her own food.
Back then, I couldn't even speak, frustration would overwhelm me, I would cry, struggling to communicate or express what I wanted, since I was the only kid with such a difficult condition, it was hard to understand me, and for me to understand others.
Well that's until my friends came along. They helped me out in learning sign language, print-on-palm or the POP method, touch cues and more. We learned together, creating some of the best memories of my childhood days.
After dinner, Felix, as always, praised my cooking, he would often say I would make a wonderful wife, and I would often giggle about how silly he was, those types of dreams meant for like Annabelle and Felix, not for people like myself. Who would marry a disabled person?
I had alway known Annabelle had a crush on Felix right from the time we were kids, so I assume someday they would eventually get married and move on with their own lives. That's why I wanted to cherish memories like these with them before that time arrives.
Annabelle had refused my help, to assist her do the dishes, she insisted that I sit and talk with Felix, at least to catch up on everything I missed while he was away.
“H-O-W I-S W-O-R-K L-A-T-E-L-Y F-E-L-I-X?.” I asked, holding his hand while I carefully traced the words. I always loved how patient Felix was with me, he would hold me like I was fragile or delicate.
As we sat on the couch, he spoke about his business, his voice close enough for me to hear and understand the conversation.
Slowly, I felt something cold gently wrap around my wrist, and when I touched it, it was like a delicate butterfly bracelet.
His calloused hand hesitantly touched mine, yet roughness evidence against my soft hands. Then, he pressed the letter on my palms.
“A G-I-F-T F-O-R Y-O-U”
W-why?” I asked using my shaking voice.
He responded by tracing more words gently onto my palms.
“B-E-C-A-U-S-E I L-I-K-E Y-O-U.”
He continues. “F-O-R A V-E-R-Y L-O-N-G T-I-M-E N-O-W”
“A-N-D I W-O-U-L-D L-O-V-E T-O T-A-K-E Y-O-U O-U-T O-N A D-A-T-E. J-U-S-T Y-O-U A-N-D M-E”
My heart stuttered, I felt my hands trembling. I wasn't even cold, yet a shiver ran down my cord. Warmth spread though my delicate heart. But it still felt unreal. Like a dream.
“B-U-T Y-O-U A-N-D A-N-N-A-B-E-L-L-E_”
I began to trace the words but Felix gently stopped me.
“I-T'S A-L-W-A-Y-S B-E-E-N Y-O-U J-E-S-S-E, A-L-W-A-Y-S.” he pressed the word firmly, not enough to hurt me but just enough for me to understand the weight of his feelings for me. And all this while I thought I would never experience anything close to love or affection.
So I thought, but here I am, standing in the kitchen with my very round belly, carrying our second twins. Yes! Twins. While making Felix’s favorite soup. Of course the father of the day won't allow me to do anything on my own. And to top it off, my best friend was also pregnant at the same time, making us look like two walking watermelons as we moved around the kitchen.
