Please take a LOOK at these posts on my profile - the 100% downvote on ALL of them... # ESPECIALLY THE MOST [RECENT ONE!](https://peakd.com/hive-124452/@jaynie/crazy-little-thing-called-life) and then explain to me how this is NOT ABUSE of the HIVE "ECO SYSTEM" @azircon CLAIMS to so religiously LIVE BY!!!! ![Screenshot 2023-09-14 031642.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/jaynie/23vhTvoMsn7QzYUNB6nB89TNhK1jFVz9cC4QW9eiUtCnBaT6TsatQGYcgpujEnFD4mjpK.png) # Hypocrisy at its finest. Before I go any further, allow me to introduce you to the biggest SNAKES on this platform... which I have PERSONALLY had dealings with (there are PLENTY more). @ acidyo @ hivewatchers @ guiltyparties @ themarkymark @ azircon @ erikah @ traciyork @ freebornsociety ALWAYS DYOR - and remember, Google and X (twitter) are your friends! Just a shallow search will open your eyes! ![Screenshot 2023-09-19 175055.png](https://images.hive.blog/DQmSnYtXPyePT8MHLPFLKYZC21LTC67JhAqEa6MwawLxnQi/Screenshot%202023-09-19%20175055.png) WATCH IT HERE: https://www.pscp.tv/w/1yNGaBMnnNDJj As for me... Well, there is no point putting time and effort into perfectly decent content on here if people like the above can piss all over it, just because they feel like it. I'm pretty sure I can find a more constructive use of my time and energy. # There is no "eco system" here - only a cesspool of circle jerkers, dick swingers and bullies. # I am DONE with the SHITFEST that is HIVE. How disappointing! After a TWO YEAR absence... I returned, posted GOOD content and yet these entitled, greedy, MOFO's are STILL bitter because I "recycled" my own fncking content once or twice a year way back when. Eye. Stick. PLANK. Pot. Kettle. BLACK! Sorry to have to leave the good people here - again! But I just wont swallow this KAK (as we commonly refer to it here in South Africa.) and so many still wonder why people leave this space, LOL! # Where are the spines, the backbones, the voices?! Show me ONE of those posts that justly warranted ANY kind of down vote - because they didn't... # and what happens? Nothing! # What do people do? NOTHING! # What do people SAY? NOTHING Why? because everyone is too SHIT SCARED to fall under the WRATH of the BULLIES themselves, lol! A carnival of cowards and keyboard warriors. Lies. Deceit. Manipulation. # Rotten, Sanctimonious NAAIERS (you can google that one yourselves, you self absorbed pricks!) As for the rest of the people here who constantly turn a blind eye - perhaps it's time for a morality check yourselves. Right... gotta run, got farming to attend to! 🖕
![Untitled (2240 x 1400 px) (1).png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/jaynie/23y8wo1UiYtmamNaCah35AfXi8mje32YXQoZMJyWzGzt5tF9iSQiKiQedzCq5ZKQkeQ91.jpg) > The road to wisdom? -- Well, it's plain and simple to express: Err and err and err again but less and less and less.” ― Piet Hein

I don't have enough fingers, toes or even hairs on my head for the amount of "mistakes" I have made in my life - though, I am not really big on the term, nor perspective ***"mistake"***. Nothing is ever lost on a mind which is open - and that is one thing I have always been grateful for having. I have seen some serious hardship in the lives of the people around me over the years - whether near or not, but to be honest - most paled by comparison to the horrendous things my mother and her sisters were put through. They were five daughters and to mention one of MANY atrocities - their mother shot and killed one of the youngest at point blank range when my mother was about 5 years old. I have personally had dreams about the room she was killed in as well as other aspects of that incident and my moms life growing up. ![Untitled (600 x 500 px) (500 x 500 px).png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/jaynie/AKcfhzm3ZbUxPShg9gqotufkCct7FUGNBkHk81xn815e7JQanGnR5e4qRA3SkRN.png)

Life has an often almost "twisted" way of teaching us the biggest lessons in the most BRUTAL of manners! My mom (as a little girl on the far left of the above photo), though strong in spirit - was always the gentlest of souls, and many of you here would have gotten to know her a little bit with her gardening posts on her @lizziesworld page - despite her reluctance to advance technologically, she was always in favour of sharing her nuggets of green finger wisdom. Why am I talking about my mom?! Well - she taught me what humility was - almost to her own detriment. She was my living breathing example of that. My mom was best friend and my emotional rock. There will never be anybody that knew me inside and out like she did - and vice versa - though both of us ferociously private in many respects. The older I get, the more I see the humour in life and the "how" it teaches you things - but only if you are receptive to those lessons (obviously). I have also learnt with age, that I care a WHOLE lot less for what people think or say about me. Honestly, this is something I have dealt with since as far back as I can recall, because I NEVER fit the mould and I have ALWAYS spoken out. Having said that, however - square peg in round hole and a voice as loud as thunder when it matters to me - I am mostly misunderstood by people because of those attributes alone. Most assume me to be an extrovert, when the truth is, I am the complete opposite. I am also ridiculously insecure - about so, SO many things!!!! I fight internal mental battles every. single. day! Though I have developed a WONDERFUL relationship with my dad now (the little boy featured in the photo below) - as a kid, I was nothing short of petrified of him! He was "old school" and my personality dynamic pretty much got me into shit every time I opened my eyes! When I was about 10, I actually ended up in hospital with a spastic colon. It has taken me my WHOLE life to stand up to my dad as an "individual" - express my voice and stand my ground. But, doing so - has allowed us to BOTH to explore the type of relationship NEITHER of us were taught was NORMAL as kids. I am eternally grateful for that. ![b4b0d341-cd0f-4804-ba48-08014d5ee13f.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/jaynie/23y8t1CjmHrP1xwKxKoiHMsPNRJERGwuBLQArYwEdcFPzWoovE8wFjUnmmybyRFK1SP3s.jpg)

My point?! I suppose, in short - we are all carry our burdens and demons. We have ALL crossed many a rickety bridge, failed at learning the right lessons in time, hurt people we did not intend to, shot ourselves in the foot, mouth and back of the head and most importantly - we are ALL cluelessly, hopefully and passionately navigating this thing we call life - day by day, (including our parents... mine and yours). Having a teenage son is a daily reminder of this. Some of you may know me well, others not so much... and plenty - not at all! I gave my heart and soul to Hive for almost half a decade. I did a LOT for this community and the people within it (as did they, in return) and I have been met with resistance PLENTY over the years, mostly because I don't have a filter accompanied by a low tolerance for bullshit. I left because of the HATE and my inability to cope with it all after my moms passing... and I came back after two years, because of my passion for writing and connecting with like minded souls. I needed the break because I lost my best friend - my life was a mess and I just seriously could not see the light! There were countless times I craved the warmth of the people I knew around here, so twice I created alt accounts and began blogging on those under the "guise" of other characters. The shoe never fit well and to be frank, it just felt EMPTY. Why? because I could not be myself. I could not share like this - like I always did! Neither of those attempts lasted more than a couple of months, if that - I have not double checked that time frame fact... I am going on guesstimation - so feel free to check yourself... @eliza.anne & @exploringella were the handles. Why am I sharing this? because I have nothing to hide and I am TIRED of people of attacking me. @azircon @erikah - I said it in my "return" [post](https://peakd.com/hive-124452/@jaynie/sometimes-in-the-wind-of-change-we-find-our-true-direction) I dont have ANY interest in drama nor conflict. I simply want to be able to write, share snippets of my journey and enjoy this space and the good people within. I won't lie though - it was ALWAYS the fear of retaliation like yours which kept me away - made me fearful of coming back "as me". If it was not this, it would have been "that". Someone would have reminded me that once or twice a year I would "re-share" content I already had - ***"DAMN YOU POST RECYCLER!!!!"*** No, we won't look at any of the positives you added to this space in 4 years - NO, we will DROWN you in your sins! CHOKE ON THEM! Despite being a leader here for a very long time, the bullies in this space triggered absolutely EVERY fear within me when thinking about coming back as MYSELF! - How fncked up is that?!!!! I KNOW for a FACT that I am not the only person who feels this way about the "clout" in this space - and even after two years... it has not changed. Not unlike real life though. So - there it is! The TWO horrible things I did. Burn me at the stake! 1. I re-shared my own written content once or twice a year. 2. I attempted to re-join this space for the release of writing under the guise of two other characters so I could just be left in peace to WRITE! (but even that didn't happen did it @erikah because it took you less than ten seconds to interrogate the dates on my photos, lol) So. Here I am. Full Transparency! I have had it AD NAUSEUM with KEYBOARD WARRIORS and CYBER BULLIES. What else would you like to interrogate me on? because this is the ONLY time and comment thread I will entertain it. Moving forward you will get NOTHING from me! I did NOT come back here for drama or politics, but @azircon - you downvoted my "[so what did I miss](https://peakd.com/life/@jaynie/so-what-did-i-miss)" post - because it was a "shit post" in your words - then after that, YOU went against your OWN word... (the stickler for ethics and the HIVE "eco system!") when downvoting my [PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE RETURN POST](https://peakd.com/hive-124452/@jaynie/sometimes-in-the-wind-of-change-we-find-our-true-direction) after CLEARLY stating that it did NOT warrant a downvote. You further tried to bully me into a corner on my comments re. my alt accounts - which is no doubt what triggered the downvote - after I did not react to your "open slander" comment. Yet, I openly shared this fact with the people who DO give a crap about me - why? because I am not ashamed of being a flawed human. The only person who seems to be enormously bugged by me... is YOU. Let me remind you of your own words *(with an appropriate priority of context revision)*: > The World and Hive is much bigger than YOU! Let's also take a look at the comment you made on my [PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE RETURN POST](https://peakd.com/hive-124452/@jaynie/sometimes-in-the-wind-of-change-we-find-our-true-direction) after already downvoting my [so what did I miss](https://peakd.com/life/@jaynie/so-what-did-i-miss)" post. Like I said in my [PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE RETURN POST](https://peakd.com/hive-124452/@jaynie/sometimes-in-the-wind-of-change-we-find-our-true-direction)...👇 ![Screenshot 2023-09-14 005626.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/jaynie/23t7YfxMyWiMkRu4nLKnvaVnNQroHjsrtHi4VhXLhQubujCthxA2rUSP7gBjGkkGH9BhF.png)

I would appreciate an explanation for your downvote on my [PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE RETURN POST](https://peakd.com/hive-124452/@jaynie/sometimes-in-the-wind-of-change-we-find-our-true-direction) which you yourself said did NOT warrant a downvote... 👇 ![06780e57-4c1a-448a-96e6-cf647e42a71b.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/jaynie/23t79KzCTuVBJ8c56kerPNhi752Yeqto8AdMiHoUtJWVBi9cWbupXNtaMtoNp638YhP4D.jpg)

In your words: > Nothing personal This is as much about principle for me, as it was for you... when you set out to attack me re. the "Hive Eco System". Like I said - I am not here for drama, but I am nobodies doormat. All my cards are on the table now. Kindly move on! Those who choose to stick around because they can identify with my "humanness", will - and those who don't - won't. I am perfectly fine with either and both. Again, in your words: > Universe will do universe. I have no ill feelings toward ANYONE here. I just want to write, have fun, enjoy the space and be myself. If you don't like me or what I have to share - MOVE ON!!!!!!!!!! That is how it works everywhere else in the world! I will NOT engage in ANY further politics nor drama. I am a living, beathing soul. My writing is decent and I am NOT a bad person - I will NOT allow space in my life for people who are simply there to spite me for their own satisfaction and bitterness. How about - instead of "hating" one another for petty BS, we try and get to know, or at least understand one another a little better! I am pretty sure it will render more positive results long term. I am here to stay. I would very much like to do so WITHOUT animosity. Please. In closing, the painting shared in my header - was one done by my mom. Having grown up in Zimbabwe, with her dad as the head game ranger at [Hwange National Park](https://www.victoriafalls-guide.net/hwange-national-park.html) she had a great love for elephants. I chose to use this image because it reminded me of who I am and what I am doing. Even in her absence, her solid and sound approach toward life will continue to guide me. ![FB_IMG_1630249005445.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/jaynie/23wqpWC4VNXp5GaK2RQxDeRJqJcYT7RWkSTXykizTdRuiaUoF8tjd7cPSxrK9T38a7AK1.jpg)

Life is crazy enough without us all trying to destroy one another - faaark! I just dont have the energy for this level of shit anymore! I just want to be happy! I just don't understand why people are so hellbent on drama and destruction nowadays. We are ALL IMPERFECT!!!!! How and WHEN did we all forget that ACCEPTANCE of this fact is ABSOLUTELY intrinsic to a healthy life?!!! I would like to become a better person, despite my failings and shortfalls. I want to show my son that life does not have to be as emotionless and brutal as what I and my parents grew up to know. I want to embrace the things that count, savour the moments which matter and discard the ones which don't. Life is short. I choose not to squander it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbN0nX61rIs

❤❤❤ ***Until next time... Much Love from Country Bumpkinland, South Africa xxx Jaynielea***
![text15.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmWXynVma7pYo3MCivJ5Cb6Nfae2uMGNt11YGxqysBGqBW/text15.png) _{ALL IMAGES ARE MY PROPERTY UNLESS OTHERWISE CREDITED} _{*Typos make me human. I may or may not get around to correcting them.*} > ***“One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.” ― Michael J. Fox***

# I AM ADDING MY RESPONSE TO A COMMENT ON THIS POST SO ALL WHO COME HERE CAN READ IT. I WILL NOT POST ON HIVE AGAIN, SO WILL SIMPLY ADD TO MY MESSAGE, HERE: Thank you so much for this - I cannot even begin to express! The floodgates opened reading it! It took a LOT for me to walk away from a space which I literally dedicated my every hour to for over four years! But - I just could not stomach it all anymore! I also apologise for this reply being the length of a post - but I will NOT post on this platform again - so I will use this space for people (who give a shit) to read and make their own way to a decision about HIVE. The hierarchy in this space have had it out for me from day one because I held a position of leadership. Hundreds of people who fell under an umbrella which was my brain child. I was a threat to them from inception - why? because I took the time, and connected with the people they considered (and treated as) worthless. But, our community grew and grew in numbers and suddenly it was impossible to ignore us... Wise business persons KNOW that true power is held in numbers. I know this well.... born and bred South African. I was slated EARLY on in the game and "they" (and all their minions) RIDICULED our community publicly and often - calling us "elitist pricks" because I would not just let "anybody" in to the discord server. FOMO much?! We entered @theycallmedan poll competition for HP and we Won... not once, but TWICE because of SHEER DETERMINATION and also.... because I , @zord189 and MANY others DROVE that ship as a community! We had PASSION for this space. I had a VOICE - and they did not like that! I entered a "witness chat" on discord once... you know, that space... where only the GODS get to speak... and I interrupted, unmuted my mic and spoke my mind. WELL, lol - needless to say THAT did not go down well, haha! - Not only did I interrupt the GODS whilst they were listening to the sounds of their own voices... but I also happened to be a vagina. The audacity of a woman.... right?! lol And then.... there was one Saturday evening when @traciyork the wench decided to down one too many vodka shots and rip @Wales (Dean Moriarty) a new one. After which, she came to my discord DM's expressing her annoyance! I was not there to witness the dispute live, and I denied the "calls" to attend to the matter - because ADULTS need to ADULT! but I did read it afterward, and Traci was nothing short of CRUEL to @wales. I am not surprised he left. Traci does not like to be challenged... especially not by ssomeone as cryptic as @wales or @quillfire. Their basic intelligence surpasses her greatest STRIVE! Back to the convo: # Everyone got EQUAL upvotes from our community account. She disapproved!!!! "As a long standing member - who gave SO MUCH of herself - SHE deserved MORE! She also questioned my allowing him back into discord - after he LEFT at the closure of that vodka induced debacle which she instigated! He committed suicide not long after that. WENCH! I have held on to this convo for years now - never really knowing why... but now I know why, because I want to show you ALL what a vindictive, immature and self-serving individual she is behind closed doors.. I have nothing to gain here and nothing to lose either. This was the conversation Traci York and I had after Wales re-joined my PHC server. She hated him SO much and was SO BITTERRRRRRR about the fact that regardless of WHO you were - EVERYONE got EQUAL rewards from our community account - INCLUDING ME!!!!!!!! hahaha!!!! # here she is... in her true colors: traciyorkLast Thursday at 3:00 PM He's back? jaynieLast Thursday at 4:26 PM Not much I can do. Lol the server is open to the public now... But hes a newbie if that's any compensation traciyorkLast Thursday at 6:09 PM Actually, there are a number of things that you could do. But not my place to tell you how to run things. jaynieLast Thursday at 6:40 PM Traci, the "beef" had previously was not involving me. Wales may not be your cup of tea, and many others perhaps, but in my opinion people do not need to like one another in order to be able to be polite and civil. I have about had it with adults in phc behaving like juveniles. I am not in a position to take sides and I will not. Nicky stormed out last night too because I called him out on an inappropriate remark made. And this was after me telling him in person how much I appreciate him. I am giving short answers right now as my mom is here and I am trying to prepare dinner. At the end of the day you all need to put your big people panties on in my opinion. traciyorkLast Thursday at 6:42 PM Understood. jaynieLast Thursday at 6:58 PM Not sure what kind of answer that is. Seems rather hostile. I am not being hostile at all. Just it would be nice if people would see things from my position. Wales, other than annoy certain people... did nothing wrong but have a tantrum and storm out. Several times. There are plenty of others here that are not "ideal" candidates and I can see that already. There are also some long standing members whom I consider pretty useless. But hey... they do what is required of them. I am somewhat stuck between a rock and a hard place when it comes to things like this. I would have thought you would have had some understanding of that. I cannot play the sides game.... whether I agree, disagree, like or loathe the individual. I have to be fair. Will have to chat later. Am about to serve dinner jaynieLast Thursday at 9:31 PM not sure what to say Traci. You behaving like this? over one member? I am actually gobsmacked. Not that it is of any consequence to you, as I see now you have not only unfollowed me, but left the community... but this was the message I just sent to everyone. ........... @everyone From primary school we are taught how to work in teams, whether it is academically directed, sports driven or otherwise related… one of life’s FIRST lessons is how to work in groups despite difference - That being, difference of opinion, difference of approach and difference of character. This learned level of respect is something which needs to be carried through to adulthood, the working environment AND this space right here within our PHC walls. We are all completely unique individuals – each with our own set of strengths and weaknesses, but we are placed in one space - together. Some days we may all get along fabulously… others - not so much. Some of us may connect REALLY well, others – not so much. Neither circumstance changes the reality that we are a team and we are here to work together IRRESPECTIVE of all that! We ALL need to be BIGGER than those trivialities! As the head of this community, I am sending this message loud and clear so that each and every one of you reads it, hears it and hopefully becomes mindful of it. It is through our differences that we find strength when we stand together. Have your discussions in the chat rooms, speak your minds – get pissed off with one another if it leads to that but at the end of the day, PLEASE – be big enough, to see passed such insignificance. I, consider us a family – but if we cannot love, fight, appreciate, scowl and debate with an underlying and fundamental respect for one another as human beings, ultimately coming together at the end of it all - then we have nothing. I believe, we have EVERYTHING! – Everything GOOD that is! - A multi-faceted recipe which results in an enormously powerful and passionate community - founded and driven upon not our differences but a simple respect and acceptance for each individual and the gems which they have to offer. .......... I am not sure how it is possible that one person can hold so much power over you? and that you would toss away so much (friendship included) for that anyway, you have clearly made up your mind and made your statement loud and clear. I will respect that.(edited) November 8, 2019 traciyorkLast Friday at 1:28 AM Thank you for telling me essentially to grow up and act like an adult - really appreciate that response. Given the fact that I politely ignored Quill's existence in the server, I could have easily done the same with Wales. What I could not stomach, however, is the fact that as a PHC newbie, he would be getting the same percent upvote (30%) from the PHC account as myself. In fact, apparently any one can walk in the PHC door and get the same amount of support as people who have worked day and night for years supporting the community. Since that's apparently your definition of fair, I decided to do the adult thing and cut my losses. Best of luck to you. jaynieLast Friday at 1:37 AM traci, he is not on our vote list. and all I have to say to the rest of what you have just divulged is - WOW! Have YOU tried to toggle and juggle votes amongst 100 people keeping the consistent VP in tact, the max reward for the account (because that is what ultimately benefits us all), make the BEST use of the 20k delegation for the time we have it, and keep every one happy at the same time? No, I didnt think so - so how about you just pipe the fuck down! That 20k delegation - well, guess what it ENDS in FEB 2020! What the FUCK do you think I am trying to do! MAXIMISE IT!!!!!!!!!! jesus fucking christ traci! you of ALL people! where is your GODDAMN FORESIGHT! If you had spent even a FRACTION of the time I have studying and testing the rewards / %'s etc you would understand what I am doing (long term) and where I am going. but you are acting like a total... CUNT, yes, over CENTS! I cannot even BELIEVE that THIS and wales has rocked your world to such a degree. I thought you trusted my vision. clearly not. and so be it. jaynieLast Friday at 2:08 AM You know, more than ALL of this - I am mortified by the fact that I actually considered you a GOOD FRIEND! I am honestly not even sure how to process it. anyway, time will handle that I suppose. x-x-x-x-x Needless to say - once she left, she very quickly proceeded to make a post about her injured thumb, how she doesnt care about the money and that she is literally "the good Samaritan" who is ever grateful to me lol - I could only find THIS copy of that ["cry me a river post"](https://www.traciyork.com/why-i-left-the-powerhousecreatives-community/) - The dust on that post had barely settled and she began ROYALLY KISSING the ARSES of ALL the people who WOULD PAY HER, lol - AKA the Hive "Cabal" which I hear is their name these days - (SO APT haha!) Traci has become THE MOST UNWELCOMING and DEMEANING presence in this space (I speak from experience through my alt account), literally spending all her hours scanning for peoples FAULTS, shortcomings and indiscretions... like she has none of her own, lol!!! Let me just say this out LOUD once and for ALLLLL - FUCK Traci.... HOW MANY MOON POSTS WERE YOU GOING TO MAKE?! "This is the moon from the left on monday" "This is the moon from the right on Tuesday" "and this one is the moon from the left and right on wednesday" WHAT A FUCKING JOKE!!!!! Those were VOTED HIGH though - EVERY...SINGLE....WEEK...... because why? because you are a KISS ASS!!!!!! and because you sold your soul for money. - and she has done NOTHING but cause CRAP in my world (on here) since (but from behind the scenes obviously, because she is a devious sociopathic witch!) She also managed to turn one a REAL LIFE FRIEND of 10 years against me, lol! but I wont even BOTHER getting into that! Traci speaks in GIFS. Ever wondered why?! because she is FAKE AS FUCK with 99.9% of what she expresses! She can't write it - because she does not FEEL it - so she throws you a GIF and slaps a HIVE logo on it for authenticity. # GAWD IT FELT GOOD TO GET THAT OFF MY CHEST! LOL! Take from it what you will (if anything) - and leave the rest! >You have not been intimidated, which in itself is honorable. >You have spoken your mind and it will be interesting to see what this noble stand brings. Cowards & bullies will never silence me. They can hate me, call me "weird" (@lordbutterfly) an amusing title shot... given your history lol ---- or even "unhinged" as @meesterboom remarked - (which is pretty rich coming from a guy that writes about beating the legs off a dog in a garage and speaks about his wife and children like they are the phlegm he spits down the toilet in the morning). I, at least have a spine! - So, weird and unhinged I shall remain! Moral compass? nah.... that does not exist here - not at all, not even with the good people!!!!!!!!