I'm so glad you wrote this, my dear @itsostylish. I hope it feels cathartic to you to write it. And I hope it helps with the healing. What you have been through would give anyone long-term post-traumatic stress syndrome. When you lost him, I heard about the sorrow and the loss, and I understood your deep love for him and the deep grief that he had passed on. I did not know you had been through all this.

You are stoic and amazing. You are made of steel! I know you did not write this so we would all be in awe of your strength, but for me that is the net result. Mind blown. I know you will be recovering from the loss as well as everything you went through for a very long time. But I hope little by little you are finding your way, and that it is a comfort that he's at peace.