“It's like living in a cupboard full of rubbish," Elise said, staring at the haphazard mess in her living room. There were boxes, papers, and clothes strewn about, and the carpet was barely visible under a layer of chaos that had been accumulating for weeks. Ever since the move, her life had been one big higgledy-piggledy jumble.
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She stepped over a mass of unopened envelopes and mail, blowing out a heavy breath. “My To-Do List where is it?” she exclaimed to herself and felt an angry discomfort rising within her. “I know I made one yesterday and now it’s nowhere to be seen as everything else.”
The fact was that since she had settled in the city, there had been no single moment of rest for her. Unpacking each box also meant one more task to be done and another diversion. She would begin sorting out the cupboards for the plates and then be interrupted by her cell phone ringing, which was her boss. She would finally do the tidying and return but eventually there will be tins of her spices all over the floor plus her dog happily chewing on her oven mitt It was like each time she attempted to restore order, more disorder ensued.
“Elise! Are you ready?” Nathan's voice came from the door and she was startled by it. Her boyfriend was standing there, grinning and all, which she knew meant he hadn’t seen the wreckage. He never did.
“I don't know why you're smiling,” she said, hands on her hips. “This place is a mess. Dinner is still a long way off, and I can’t even find my shoes.”
Nathan stepped over a pile of magazines with a shrug of his shoulders. "It is not particularly bad," he said lightly straightening up taking a pair of sneakers from behind the couch. “I found them. See?”
She took the shoes and stubbornly shook her head. “You don’t understand, Nate. It is not merely the shoes. It is everything else as well. I cannot even make out what is happening in this… this mess!”
He stared round about and then back at her. "Well, you don't have to do it all at once, you know? We can take it slow."
“Slow?” she repeated raising a little too much of concern in her voice. “We have been in this place for three weeks, three weeks and the place still looks like a tornado blew through. Even at this pace we’ll be unpacking until Christmas!"
Nathan went on to join sitting back on the sofa with his hands up in the air. His easy-going smile faltering for a second. "Okay, okay. I get it. But freaking out about it isn’t gonna help."
Elise let out a frustrated groan, knowing he was right, but unable to let go of the growing panic inside her. How could he be so calm when everything felt so out of control?
Nathan grabbed her by the shoulders gently, forcing her to meet his eyes. ‘Let’s just concentrate on this one for now, all right? I assure you that when we go for dinner, it’s going to be great because good food is always the best, and this higgledy-piggledy mess that you see on the table; we will deal with it the day after tomorrow. Together.’
She wanted to argue, to rage and point out all the tasks that were provided. However, it felt as if her bones themselves were tired and so the arguments were tiresome too. The mess that was her life was not only contained within the four walls of her apartment. Her work, her relationships, every single thing was going haywire. And yet Nathan’s optimism was the only positive feature in the whole picture.
‘That is fine,’ muttered Elise. ‘But tomorrow, the kitchen will be the first room on my agenda. I am not living out of boxes any more.’
‘Deal,’ Nathan said, giving her a quick kiss on the forehead. ‘Alright, but let’s get out of here before you wade into something else that you would like to clean.’
The next morning, true to his word, Nathan was ready to help, though Elise suspected he didn’t fully grasp the magnitude of what they were facing. The kitchen was a war zone of mismatched utensils, half-unpacked boxes, and random gadgets she had forgotten she owned. It was as if someone had taken her perfectly organized life and dumped it out like a spilled puzzle.
“This… is going to take forever,” she said with a hand rubbing her temple.
“Only if you keep on staring at it as if it is one big problem,” Nathan said. “As you will watch, we will settle it bit by bit. Watch.”
He took a box marked kitchen essentials and began searching for items to put back into the drawer and cabinets. The tortoise pacing which was not so fascinating however worked somehow calmed her rather frazzled nerves. For the very first time in as many as three weeks, the overwhelming feeling of chaos seemed manageable, like it could be tamed if she just followed his lead.
She wiped down the countertops, catching a glimpse of herself in the reflection of the microwave. Her hair was disheveled, her eyes tired, but for the first time in weeks, she didn’t look defeated. Nathan’s voice broke her from her thoughts.
"Hey, look at this," he said, holding up an old recipe book. "Found this buried under a bunch of junk. You remember your mom used to make that crazy apple pie recipe from here?"
Elise grinned, lost in reverie. ‘Oh I remember,’ she said musingly and took the book from him. She leafed through the tattered leaves and a tinge of nostalgia crept into her heart. ‘She had no issues with the kitchen being in chaos so long as the pie was good.’
Nathan laughed. “See? Your mother really did understand the priorities. Maybe we’ve been stressing out over the wrong things.”
Elise put her back on the counter and stared at the half-emptied cabinets in the kitchen perceptively this time. Perhaps Nathan was correct. Perhaps a little mess was not as big a deal as she assumed. Perhaps higgledy-piggledy was not something scary, but rather something to be celebrated- a natural order of things that made the quiet moments more enjoyable.
She turned her gaze to Nathan who was now playing the game of balancing a tower of plates in the compartment with a hint of a smile plastered on his face. She watched as the tower tilted, and before she could utter a word, the plates clattered to the ground, shattering in a million pieces.
For a second, there was silence, the kind that felt heavy with anticipation. But then, to her surprise, Elise started laughing. Really laughing.
Nathan remained transfixed, his mouth agape. “Uh, you okay?”
She nodded, still laughing out loud. “Yeah. Yeah, I think I am all right.”
For perhaps in this chaotic world, that is all there is to it-to make a laugh of the chaos, collect the shards and move on.
