—rest a moment."
When trust is shattered, when hopes are dashed, when a loved one leaves you, before doing anything, just pause your life and rest a moment.
These were the first few lines I read from the book How to be Calm in a Busy World by Haemin Sunim while we were waiting for our Laksa Lemak at the Merlion Resto not so long ago. It struck me that I took a photo of the page.
My sister cried her heart out when I visited her the other week. It turned out she had been bottling up heartaches after heartaches for over a year, silently lamenting for things that were out of her control, and it continued to hurt her deeply.
I didn't know what to do or say, so I stayed quiet and listened as she poured everything out. Her shoulders shaking, her tears fell uncontrollably as she sobbed. While we often talked, she never hinted at anything. "I'm really sorry. I didn't know..." were the only words that came out of my mouth. I'm really bad at consoling someone who is hurting.
When she calmed down, we had a heart-to-heart conversation. It was then that I realized she was severely stressed out and on the verge of depression. Certain words trigger her pain. Like our late mother, she doesn't want to trouble others (even her own spouse) and keeps her troubles to herself until she can no longer bear them and finally bursts.
Thank goodness I visited that day, and she was able to release her emotional baggage—if not all, at least some of it.
She confessed she had been going to church and letting her tears fall even in the presence of others. And that she learned to step away from her business and let the hired help take good care of things. She started going for walks, sleeping more, allowing herself some lazy days or mornings.
Perhaps those are her own ways of pausing life, resting, and hopefully heal soon.
Photo taken by me, from the book, How to be Calm in a Busy World. No copyright infringement intended. 05092026/09:38ph
