Life can be so funny and unpredictable at times, one minute you are overly excited, and the next minute you are sad, sulking, and whining why things aren’t going your way.
At some point in our lives, we’ve all gotten to that phase in our lives when nothing interests or excites us anymore, We are just indifferent about everything, we just face life one day at a time, You are there but you aren’t there, you just keep staring into empty space and thinking of nothing in particular.
I am currently in that phase of my life and I honestly don’t know when I would be out of it.
I am worried this phase is lasting longer than I expected. I thought it was only going to linger for a couple of days but it’s been a week already.
It’s been one week of torture, one week of indifference, one week of being void of all emotions, it’s been one week of doing my favourite things and still not deriving joy in doing them, I have been restless and basically “just there”.
The most bubbling person in the room has slowly become a shadow of herself, “Get some rest IB” they say, “Watch some movies”, “Hang out with your friends”, boy, I have been doing this, and many more but I have been indifferent, no excitement just me being there observing and thinking of irrelevant things.
I keep trying to figure out what the problem is but until now I can’t come up with anything tangible.
To crown my whole gloomy mood up, I have a swollen eye, this has prevented me from going anywhere without my shades and my favourite pair of shades fell and broke two days ago, lol the universe is dealing with me and honestly, it’s scoring some great points, I tell you. I can’t go to work nor can I go to any function.
I have been on medication for some days now but I don’t seem to see any improvement, I keep staring at my mirror every now and then expecting to see my eye back to normal but nahh it is still the same, maybe I’m just being paranoid.
I am worried sick because my birthday is next week and a close friend of mine’s wedding is this weekend, my dress, hair, and everything is ready except my eye, Lol who would have thought my eye was gonna change at the last minute? It’s so sad that all of these chose the wrong time to descend on me and I sincerely do not know how to respond to everything happening right now in my life.
My Hive activities have suffered greatly within these past few days, I do not have the energy to read or engage with other authors like I usually do, coming up with this post was so difficult as it took everything in me to sit down to put it all together.
I’m taking a break from everything to see if I can find my spark again and I honestly can’t wait to find it as it’s long overdue.
I miss all my happy moments, I miss genuinely laughing out loud, I miss teasing my friends and seeing them whining about how annoying I am, I miss cracking my silly jokes and watching my friends laugh, I miss being active on Hive and cheering my favourite authors on.
When will I be able to get over this feeling?
When will I be happy and jolly again?
I pray I get back to being my old self as this being right here is an alien.
Thank you for taking the time to read, this is me thinking out loud.
All images were downloaded from pixabay
Thanks for stopping by
Loads of Love🥰🥰
XOXO
