MOTHERHOOD CHALLENGES
I'm a man but I adore women a lot due to their contribution in the society and the challenges they face while raising their children. In some societies mothers are faced with a challenging choice to make due to situations around. Mothers in life may feel trapped between two choices like 'seek help and risk loosing their kids, or stay in the life and stay together' but no mother will like loosing the bond she has with her kids.
When a woman becomes a mother, her basic needs for income, food and shelter dramatically increase. To exit the life and find a different ways to meet those needs, a mother needs help from social services like welfare, housing and sometimes addiction services. Atimes they undergo emotional trauma due to the way the society view them when they are seeking help for their children, they may see them as a threat instead of a mother seeking help for her children. Even on the quest of seeking those help she also risk loosing her children or her children being taken away from her, yes they always have this fear that their children might be taken away from them.
THE HARD CHOICE
Due to the challenging situation a mother face she has to make a hard choice that'll aid her in survival and to care for her children and some of this choice might be against her wish but she's left with no choice than to accept it and one of this hard choice might include turning to a sex worker which is also hard to find due to the fact that she is a single mom and has her kids on her care.
While there are some services that support single mom in the sex trade, her rational fear can limit her access to resources. Securing housing for a single mother can be difficult especially with a prostitution record. Traffickers can easily exploit this needs. At that moment the life has increased control over her and her kids. At this moment the risk of intergenerational prostitution and trauma is set in motion "it was an epiphany for me that there may be a fourth generation... Is this going to be my daughter's future?" Asked Nicole_survivor and a service provider. So in the fear to curb that intergenerational course that she'll need help or other services that will not ruin her family.
HOW CAN WE RELEASE THE BURDEN ON OUR MOTHERS
Motherhood is a pivotal moment. When accessible system supports an understands the needs of a mother and the choices she makes, a path opens for her to support her family's well being as well as her own. But we need to exit such life yes the society has a role to play on this.
The society has to create a safe environment for the mother, but how can this be done? Those who see beyond the stigma surrounding a mother in the Life can understand her dilemma and help her access the support she and her children need. This include:
- PEDIATRICIAN AND OB/GYN DOCTOR, yes they should work alongside mother as she care for her kids.
- TEACHERS, see the impacts of family instability on children and can connect families to services.
- FAMILY AND SOCIAL WORKERS, Can advocate to support the needs of mothers and their children.
- CHILD PROTECTIVE SERVICES (CPS), can see mother's as part of the child's overall well-being.
- SHELTER STAFF, Can provide homeless women and their children with what they need when they are the most vulnerable
- SCHOOL COUNSELORS, can be trusted adult for children and their families.
- CHILDREN, FAMILY, AND YOUTH FUNDERS, Support programs that provide services to marginalized and exploited mothers.
STEP TOWARDS CHANGE
The social systems can rally around mothers and children as they work to ease the challenges and burden on motherhood in our society at large and that requires a gradual step and a lot of commitment:
I. CREATE A SAFE PART TO EXIT: If a woman in the Life knows her connection to her kids isn’t threatened, she is more likely to act on their behalf. Her desire to raise her child in a safe, stable, supported home can be a huge motivator to leave the Life, but she needs people to work with her and not against her.
II. OFFER WRAP AROUND RESOURCES:While many social agencies are overburdened and under-resourced, it is vital to connect the multiple needs of a mother, like childcare and job placement. Teams of diverse service providers can work together to disrupt her dependence on her exploiter and the Life itself to break an intergenerational cycle of poverty and exploitation.
III. SUPPORT YOUNG FAMILIES AND MOTHERS:Young girls who become mothers have an increased need for safety, shelter, skill-building and support. Services can make a big difference, especially those that can provide child care or services in the home. It'll be an added advantage if an enterprenural education is organized where they can acquire knowledge and skill that'll help them to maximize their resources. It'll hurt you to know that most of this women are victim of human trafficking but they're always willing to engage into something to care for their children.
IV. CREATE SPECIALIZED HOUSING FOR MOTHERS AND CHILDREN:The society has to take it as a responsibility for creating housing opportunities for mothers and children that shelters and support them. Meeting this fundamental need for moms and kids can remove a significant barrier to exit and create a new platform for change.
V. MAKE THE CONNECTION:Mothers and pregnant women in the Life need social support and resources to help turn what may feel like a hopeless situation into a hopeful path forward. When a girl or woman in the life seeks healthcare for her pregnancy and her children, it's an opportunity to connect her to broader social services. Also family centered services can interrupt the cycle of poverty and trauma faced by women and their children while reducing the barriers to leaving.
CONCLUSION
I would like to see a home-setting environment especially for this population that provides services such as training for living independently, time management, self care and parenting. This environment could teach them valuable life skills while being loving, compassionate and understanding.
There needs to be more programs that accommodate women leaving the Life with their children. While in these programs, they should receive counseling, case management, advocacy and job training. They should only have to leave the program once they have completed it and have a new place to live. They should be given a grant to help them start something that'll help curb the difficulties they're facing and wipe away this intergenerational poverty.
........ What measures do you think should be included to ease the stress and burden on mothers who are being exploited in the quest to care for their children?..... Your contribution will be highly appreciated. Feel free to drop your thoughts in the comment section