The personal bond or relationship you have with someone depends mostly on two things. Blood and choice. The bond of blood is by birth and the people with whom you share a blood relationship are your relatives e.g your parents, siblings, cousins, aunties, uncles, children, grandchildren, grandparents etc. The blood bond is by nature and its creation is not usually chosen for the last generation. The bond of choice on the other hand is made by one’s choosing i.e you choose the person or people you want to connect with for example your girlfriend, wife, husband, boyfriend and friends.
At any one point the bond of choice will always be greater than the bond of blood alone. The bond of blood alone is basically a relative you have never connected with in your entire life. They are basically strangers. However, the bond of blood and choice is greater than choice alone. It includes the relatives you were born around and grown up with for most or atleast part of your entire life. You were born to them but you also chose them as your people. You love each other and you support each other. One would argue that choice is stronger than blood and choice when a (wo)man leaves his(her) parents to be with his wife(her husband) but this isn’t the case. Simply because they have not really abandoned their parents but simply taken on a new part or branch in their life that grants them extra joy, happiness and fulfillment. In short, blood and choice>>choice>>blood.
The length of the relationship, the tests endured, the purity and sincerity are some of the other things that make bonds or relationships stronger e.g one wouldn’t forget the friend with whom he or she went through a hard time, or the friend they’ve had since childhood, or the most honest friend that always looks out for you and supports you.
Mutual likes sure create friends fast but mutual hatred creates friends much faster. You’ll bond faster with someone if you find out you both hate the same things than if you both like the same things. Simply because hatred is purer than love. Once you hate something or someone, you really do hate them. But if you love them you’re just never sure. You probably like them but don’t love them or you’ve convinced yourself you love them but only love the idea of it or you just feel secure around them.
“What do you really love about her?”
“I don’t know. I just do.”
That’s absolute nonsense because you must be able to name atleast one thing you love about someone you say or think you love.