Onething about me is I've always had this fight with inferiority complex and low self esteem this two plung me so bad into series of depression anytime something wasn't going right.
Growing up I've learned to always try as much as I can to the best of my knowledge live right, strategies. think ahead, thats because I want to break free from this poor images of myself, always looking at how some persons are better off, all the while undermining myself and all I can do.
I know i am alot, lot of potentials, skills, intellectuals but yet untapped, finding the right circumstances and conditions seems forever, but what I've learned so far is to initiate the process no matter what whether the conditions are right or not.
while in the midst of my dilemma somehow i pause to reflect and it really dawn on me that I've really been ungrateful all along, literally saying it but in reality I was living the opposite.
I'm good in some areas, gotten some privileges, I've come this far, gotten to some levels that are still a wish to many, surrounded by a family that loves me right, by extension privileged to some things that gave me leverage, as i ponder on these things I really began to realise that I should be more grateful for life.
I and a friend of mine casually made a joke about this, he told me a lot of persons are dreaming to be in my shoes, I just laughed, to me no body would ever want to be me, cause its really hard to be me but then again I thought hard on this and I realize I am really privileged atleast with some basic necessity.
my heart felt calm and a soft smiled appeared on my face, I'm truly grateful for life and all that I've gotten, God has been faithful and he's still is, even tho I'm not where I want to be, atleast I'm not where I use to be, somehow the growth are visible, tho the opportunities aren't up yet, I know that I'm on a process, and the future is indeed very bright and promising.
make gratitude an attitude