Sorry for those horrible things you experienced. I can't imagine living a life in a time when people aren't as aware of the mental illnesses as we are now.

To find out that all my illnesses I have had over the past 25 years of been an adult have been down to ADHD makes me think about what I could have done with my life if I had known sooner.

Indeed, it is really hard to live when you don't even know what's going on with yourself. I lived like that for 10 years too. Was horrible! But I'm glad you were able to know about it now and that you're taking medicines. Before those meds though, did the doctor ask if you would like to try other methods as well? Like talk therapy, art therapy, meditation, etc?

So happy that your wife is very understanding as well. Proud of you both for overcoming this, and will overcome more challenges.

Also, use your hyperfocus as your advantage/strength. Do what you really want and it will be very rewarding once you know how to take advantage of that. Wish you all the best!