I'm Selfish and I Know It

I don't think what I am about to write is some new groundbreaking philosophy. In fact, it is basically just a layman's translation of B.F. Skinner's psychological theory of Operant Conditioning. I'd imagine the vast majority of you might be thinking "The what of who?" But for teachers, this is one of the theories that is crammed down our throats from our first educational psychology course.

And yes. Principal Skinner is 100% named after that B.F. Skinner.

But it is OK if you have never taken an educational psychology course. This theory, just like most of the things educational "gurus" try to sell school districts is just common sense. It goes a little like this... now hear me out... come closer. You can get a person to do something... if you give them a reward (positive reinforcement)! What? No way!!!! But I swear it's true.

But wait. I'm not done. You can also get someone to do something if you remove something unpleasant (negative reinforcement). Something like "I'll stop screaming Cher's 'Believe' once you take out the garbage." Yep. That works too... shocking!

And for the cherry on top, get this... if you want someone to stop doing something, you can punish them. This is why you can actually get a teenager to listen as long as you can (and will follow through with) taking away their phone. Or if you really want to fuck with them, let them keep their phone but throttle down the Wi-Fi speed so their computer freezes every 10 seconds when they are watching a YouTube video.

There you go. Now you are all experts in B.F. Skinner's groundbreaking and brilliant theory of Operant Conditioning.

But wait. I still have a point to make. Earlier today @bozz wrote a great post about commenting on posts on Hive and whether or not one should comment if the other person does nothing back. He wondered if it were selfish to stop commenting in these situations. Since I am a trained expert in Operant Conditioning (just like you are now), it took me about two seconds to answer an emphatic "Yes... but who cares? You're an awesome, genuine guy."

But let me explain. Remember that Skinner guy? According to him (and common freaking sense) we are all selfish. We only do things for one of three reasons: to get a reward, to remove something unpleasant, or to avoid a punishment. Duh!

But here's my added spin. To me, the measure of a "good" person is what constitutes a reward, what causes them to feel unpleasant, and what acts as a punishment.

For me, being a "good" person just means you get rewards from doing "good" things. When someone helps a short old lady get a can from the top shelf of the store, it makes them feel good. Maybe they didn't consciously do this because they knew they were about to feel good about it, but the subconscious counts. Good subconscious = good person.

We can extended this out to the other two things that shape behavior. If a person looks at the woman struggling and feels unpleasant while watching them suffer so they walk over and lend a hand, that is a "good" person. They cared. Someone else's struggle ignited an unpleasant feeling in them that caused them to act. It is still selfish, they had the unpleasant feeling removed, but it is still good. the opposite would also hold true. If you feel pleasant when you see the woman struggling, I'd argue that is not being "good".

And finally the punishment. If a person sees the woman struggling and thinks "If I don't help her, I'm going to feel guilty all day." and then they help her, they are selfishly avoiding that punishment of feeling guilty. I'd argue the fact that they would think about this and feel guilty is another sign of being "good".

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So for me, "good" or "bad" just comes down to what causes someone pleasure and pain. A "good" person is merely a selfish person (like we all naturally are) who derives pleasure from being kind and pain from being mean. While a "bad" person derives pleasure from being mean and pain from being kind. It is as simple as that.

So now what the heck does this have to do with commenting on Hive? Well we need to extend this out to things beyond "good" and "bad". That is just the emotional side. There is also a practical and mental side. We all also get practical rewards and punishment. Some people call this... money. Going to work only because you get a paycheck does not make you good or bad. It makes you a human who needs to eat. Not all rewards need to make you feel emotionally fulfilled. I'd argue that most don't. They are more practical.

We also all get "mental" rewards. These rewards might not help anyone else or earn you money, but they leave you mentally fulfilled. Maybe someone asks you a question that gets you thinking about a topic in a new way. Maybe you learn something new from an interaction. Maybe you read something that sparks a new thought or understanding.

So here was my answer to @bozz: Humans are naturally selfish. I'd argue that you should only do things that provide an emotional, practical, or mental reward. If you are not getting anything out of commenting, then that is a one sided relationship and those are very rarely healthy. Avoiding an unhealthy relationship is never selfish... well except for that whole negative reinforcement part.