I'd come here hundreds of times before, armed with my lap top and a book; The coffee was good and they had a couple of spots, well out of the way from others, to hide in whilst I worked or read.
The world passed me by, largely unnoticed, but occasionally I'd people-watch, make up stories about strangers going about their life. It made me feel connected with the outside world, without actually having to connect with it too much.
I didn't expect much from my coffee shop habit; Just coffee and a tenuous link to a society I felt was better kept at arms length. There I would sit and pretend I felt comfortable with people around me whilst projecting an invisible barrier around me, holding them away.
But that all changed one rainy Saturday morning when I happened to look up from my book and into her eyes...
...It felt right, being locked in her gaze; Comfortable.
I immediately dropped mine though, my aversion to society kicked right in...I felt compelled to raise them once more though, I wanted to lose myself again...She was still looking at me. That took only a brief second - Surely she'll look away I had thought, maybe she never intended to lock eyes with me in the first place. I hoped I was wrong...And here she was still looking my way. src
I wanted to feel connected once more. Moments passed, I know not how long, and still our eyes were locked; Mere seconds that felt eternal.
I felt trapped; I was willingly imprisoned within her gaze and whilst I knew it was impossible I felt emotionally naked under her gaze, my innermost thoughts and feelings laid bare...And then she smiled.
I could feel my heart pounding; A quickening within as if one moment all was dark and the next I was in a world of lovely soft pastel colours, and warmth the central point being those eyes and that smile, a beauty indelibly imprinted upon my senses...
I heard nothing; The sounds of the café had long before ceased to exist. There was simply her and I locked in a gaze that spoke volumes without a word being uttered.
I smiled back hoping it looked right, but knowing it was my usual lopsided grimac,e and her smile widened in reply, it touched her eyes, and transformed her into the most glorious thing I had ever seen...
...Then the spoon dropped, and the moment was broken.
The café came back to life and I hated society for ruining my moment; Our gaze broke and she turned away...But only for a moment. She seemed to wrestle with a thought within her mind and then...She rose and walked towards me.
Hello, she said, and she smiled almost shyly, but with warmth.
...That was years ago but I still see her beautiful face...I wake up to it every day. That café is long gone, but the spark that ignited the flame between her and I that rainy Saturday morning never did.
[Fictional]
Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - Tomorrow isn't promised.
Be well
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