Teachers are human, and I know it’s impossible to hide it from our students, but I’m wondering how the other teachers out there handle being sick, sad or injured in front of their kids?

image source.

I hurt my leg last Wednesday night. I was at the climbing gym with @somebuttstuff and we were bouldering. I am admittedly new to climbing and not very skilled. This was my first real go at bouldering. It’s hard! And totally different from climbing on belay. Christopher was very encouraging but I was tired, and feeling a little self-conscious in the gym atmosphere. When you are higher up it is easier to pretend you are by yourself and nobody is watching. While bouldering, I felt way more on display. Anyways, Christopher gave me the very important tip of trying to push off from the wall as you fall, which I accomplished, but forgot to think about my limbs in the process. I twisted my leg pretty badly, which made Christopher feel guilty. I felt embarrassed. I was sick the weekend before, and I was feeling a lot of feelings.

Image source. Curse you bouldering wall!

So I’ve been limping around the school for a few days.

My students are incredibly caring young people, so naturally they ask how I’m doing. Last Thursday, being that I was feeling pretty sensitive about the whole thing, questions were hard. I managed to not cry in front of a kid, but I did have a little sob in the nurse’s office. Sometimes I have a difficult time being vulnerable, and I get frustrated.

How do you deal with being human?

I thought about staying home on the Thursday, but when I’m struggling emotionally teaching is actually a huge help. If I lead an engaging lesson, I can forget about almost anything. A few years back, when I was going through a bad breakup, school was the only thing that got me through. It was during the summer that I had the hardest time.

Do you try to hide your personal life from your students?

With the aforementioned breakup, I didn’t tell my kids for a long time. Many of them had met my boyfriend at school functions, so for a while I had to just redirect any comments about him. Then, when I was ready, I made a comment to a small group of students, knowing that the word would spread.

I typically do share personal issues or stories with them, though I obviously leave out certain details. They are usually very understanding, but I know not everyone is comfortable with this. I’ve also known many of these students for years, so we have the history for me to be able to share. I’m sure I would try to be a little more closed off with a new class. Or, a younger class. I’m not sure how I would share any of that with an elementary student.

Do you take time off?

I know that this works for a lot of teachers, or becomes the only option for them. Of course if your health is involved, that has to come first.

Have you cried in front of your kids?

I have. I never really want to but it’s happened. For example, I got pretty upset in a lesson about politics once (maybe regarding a certain election, even though I don’t live in the US) and I got all red faced and teary. It was scary. I was mad at myself for my inability to regulate my emotions. Luckily my co-teacher at the time came to my rescue and I was able to excuse myself.

Life throws a lot at you. Whether it’s you or a loved one, you have to process things like illness or hardship. As teachers we have to go through all of this while still looking after the learning and social emotional health of our students. I know that my colleagues have come to my rescue many-a-time. I hope everyone has a work buddy that helps them out, as well. If anyone ever needs to chat on here, I'm willing to listen!

This is a bit of a steemit-sob-session. Forgive me! I’m doing a lot better this week, though my leg is still bothering me. I really hope it gets better so that I can go skiing during spring break.

Grumble, grumble, let’s just amputate it, grumble.

If you want to see my last teacher-y blog post, it is KP’s Teacher Tales #14: Multicultural Classrooms.